Common symbols for grief and loss include the color black (Western mourning) or white (Eastern mourning), a black ribbon, a dove (releasing soul), a candle flame (enduring memory/hope), cypress trees (transition/eternity), and specific flowers like lilies or chrysanthemums, representing different aspects of loss, memory, or rebirth.
Black is the most common and widely recognized color for expressing grief in many cultures. It has come to symbolize loss and sadness, visually representing the emptiness left behind by someone who has passed away.
Even today, a wreath is a common gift to a family who has lost a beloved member. The willow tree, sometimes called a “weeping willow” because the leaves appear to be tears falling from the branches, is also a symbol of mourning.
A candle is one of the most universal mourning symbols because it does something while you sit with your grief: it burns, it warms, it changes. For some, a candle represents the soul; for others, it's simply a visible way to keep vigil—one small light in a dark season.
The chrysanthemum, or mum, makes a wonderful choice when mourning with a family that has ties to Europe or Asia. China, Korea and Japan use white chrysanthemums to symbolize grief. When mourning someone who displayed strength and character in life, the gladioli is an excellent choice to send to the family.
Black ribbon awareness icon representing mourning, remembrance, and loss. Often used for memorial designs, tribute graphics, national days of mourning, or to show solidarity during tragic events.
Wearing dark grey or deep blue is just as appropriate as black, while brown and lighter greys are suitable for the vast majority of funeral services. However, unless specifically requested by the deceased or their family, you should avoid any bright colors such as yellows, oranges, pinks, and reds.
These signs may include butterflies, rainbows, specific animals, or even numbers that hold special meaning. Some people report feeling a sense of peace or warmth when they encounter these signs, interpreting them as messages from their loved ones, reassuring them that they are still present in spirit.
The "3 Cs of Grief" for adults are Choose, Connect, Communicate, a framework to actively manage loss by choosing helpful actions, connecting with supportive people, and communicating needs. For children, the 3 Cs are often Cause, Catch, and Care, addressing their deep-seated fears about what caused the death, if they can "catch" it, and if they are safe and cared for. Both frameworks offer simple, actionable ways to navigate grief's confusion and find healing.
The tattoo serves as a permanent reminder of how significant the relationship was, and how much they were loved. Some people feel that the physical pain experienced in the process of having a memorial tattoo represents the emotional grief they are going through.
Elephants
They bury their dead and pay tribute to the bodies and to the bones.
Mourning Colors From Around the World
“So grief is like this: There's a box with a ball in it. And a pain button… In the beginning, the [grief] ball is huge. You can't move the box without the ball hitting the pain button.
Flowers, plants and wildlife. Flowers are among the most universal symbols of grief. Each bloom carries a meaning that adds depth to expressions of mourning.
Symbolic grief is a term used to describe the emotional pain we feel when facing losses that may not involve death but carry deep, symbolic meaning.
A black ribbon is a symbol of remembrance or mourning. It is often worn or put on a public display to express consolation.
FAQs about the 5 stages of grief
Depression is usually the longest stage of grief so therefore then can be perceived as the hardest. In order to come out of this stage we actually need to allow ourselves to feel our deepest sadness, only after that can we then begin to move through the final stages.
When grieving, don't suppress emotions, isolate yourself, rush the process, or use substances to numb pain; instead, allow yourself to feel, stay connected with supportive people, and seek professional help if needed, as grief has no timeline and everyone experiences it uniquely. Avoid platitudes like "everything happens for a reason" or "they're in a better place," and don't make major decisions too soon. Focus on self-care, even if it's basic, and accept that grief is messy, not linear.
Tips for getting by
Asian countries see white chrysanthemums as a symbol of grief, whereas European countries view this flower as a symbol of death and only use them for memorial services or graves. In the United States, chrysanthemums are typically viewed as lighthearted flowers that honor the life of the lost loved one.
The 40-day period holds spiritual and cultural meaning in many traditions, often symbolizing a time of reflection, remembrance, and honoring the soul's journey. Emotions during this time may shift—from initial shock to deeper sorrow or quiet acceptance—as the reality of the loss settles in.
9 Ways to Honor a Loved One Who Has Passed
However, one thing that is never okay to do is to bring drugs or drinks to a funeral or to show up intoxicated. This is the number one sign of complete disrespect and rudeness. Imagine if it was your funeral. You wouldn't want someone opening a beer or having a hidden flask of drinks.
Casual Clothing: Items like jeans, t-shirts, shorts, and casual footwear such as sneakers or flip-flops are generally not suitable for funerals. These convey a casualness that is out of place at a solemn event.
White: White represents purity, peace, and the soul's journey to the afterlife. It is often used in Eastern cultures and for the funerals of young people or children.