Because in a narcissistic relationship we have taken on so many of the other person's struggles and so much of their identity as our own, we may feel like we'd be giving up part of ourselves if we were to leave them. If they have become the center of our world, we may then feel lost without them.
There are many reasons; one, is that they are bigger than life. Narcissists are not your typical persons, and relationships with them are anything but normal. It is very difficult to break free from a relationship with a narcissist. In order to do so you must realize some truths about the reality of your situation.
They typically lie, cheat, steal, gaslight, and care little for the other person's feelings. The relationship is one-sided, and the narcissist's needs are paramount. Because the narcissist is very charming and persuasive, it is hard for the other person to know exactly what is wrong.
Narcissists can make us feel special. If we were to lose them, we would also lose the spotlight that shines on them. We may feel resistant to leaving, because we're afraid of sacrificing the feeling of specialness we gained by being linked to them.
Narcissists also gaslight or practice master manipulation, weakening and destabilizing their victims; finally, they utilize positive and negative emotions or moments to trick others. When a narcissist can't control you, they'll likely feel threatened, react with anger, and they might even start threatening you.
Narcissists and abusers are basically codependent. (See “Narcissists are Codependent, too.”) If you distance yourself from them, they do what it takes to pull you back in, because they don't want to be abandoned. Narcissists want to keep you interested to feed their ego and supply their needs (“narcissistic supply”).
Do Narcissists Also Feel the Trauma Bond? Abusive narcissists likely do feel the bond too, but differently. It's so confusing for anyone in a relationship with a narcissist who's abusive to understand why they continue to hurt them, even when they say they love them.
Whatever the reasons for starting the relationship, it will eventually end. Narcissists tire of their victims when they've exhausted their supply of care, money, or whatever else they were after. As quickly as they entered your life, they leave it, which can leave the victim incredibly confused, broken, and lost.
Narcissists hate losing their supply of attention, so they won't let you go easily. Prepare for them to promise "to change." They might suddenly start doing things for you that you'd been complaining about. They may say "you'll be lost without me," or "you'll never find someone like me." Don't listen, Orloff advises.
Rely on your support system: Make sure that you are surrounding yourself with the loved ones and hobbies that support you and your mental health. Trust your gut: It's vital that you listen to your own intuition, especially since narcissists have a tendency to attack that in others.
You're naïve.
Narcissists use a range of emotionally manipulative behaviours in their relationships. If you're not this kind of person and are more naïve in nature, you may simply be drawn into relationships with narcissists because you lack the ability to recognise what they are up to in the early stages.
They WILL move on quickly because narcissists tend to view other people (including their partners) as conveniences — and once you are no longer useful, they will move on.
1. An empath will understand they were being used. When an empath leaving narcissist situation occurs, it is generally because the empath is unable to take any additional abuse from the narcissist. They may not feel like they are being treated properly and understand that they deserve to be with someone who cares.
Through ongoing gaslighting and demeaning of the partner, the narcissist undermines the individual's self-worth and self-confidence, creating extreme emotional abuse that is constant and devastating.
Anxiety and depression commonly develop as a result of narcissistic abuse. The significant stress you face can trigger persistent feelings of worry, nervousness, and fear, especially when you never know what to expect from their behavior.
Psychological trauma from their abuse will not just go away. In fact, this type of abuse can cause long lasting post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD. The abuse from a narcissist is overwhelming. It is hard to identify and sufferers tend to blame themselves and continue to suffer long after the relationship is over.
Even after the toxic relationship has ended, victims suffer PTSD, C-PTSD, panic attacks, phobias, and more due to the triggering of their primal fears by their overactive amygdalae.
Narcissistic abuse is insidious and can cause lasting effects like low self-esteem, trust issues, self-doubt, grief, depression, and anxiety. With time and treatment, it's possible to heal and overcome these issues, recovering parts of yourself and your life that were lost to the abuser.