At a primal level, the uncertainty of silence feels like rejection, and the fear of rejection leads people to panic. This is why when you feel safe and comfortable around someone, silence doesn't trigger the same fear response — it's not awkward. Being silent while with a loved one can feel incredibly comforting.
Silence isn't always peaceful; sometimes it comes across as sinister. People who struggle with silence also often feel the fear to be left alone and fear the unknown. The fear of ghosts is also associated with this phobia. – Experiencing rapid heartbeat and nausea.
Some can find this unsettling – they don't know what you're thinking, and this may make them uncomfortable. People's discomfort around quiet people can also be cultural; western society portrays successful and outgoing people as outgoing and exuberant.
Silence can mean many things in interpersonal relationships. It's ambiguous. It can express lots of different emotions ranging from joy, happiness, grief, embarrassment to anger, denial, fear, withdrawal of acceptance or love. What it means depends on the context.
At a primal level, the uncertainty of silence feels like rejection, and the fear of rejection leads people to panic. This is why when you feel safe and comfortable around someone, silence doesn't trigger the same fear response — it's not awkward.
Being left in silence can be extremely painful, as it involves the loss of connection, love, intimacy, and sometimes even family participation.
Silence Can Be Intimidating and Revealing Without Being Forceful. Perhaps the anticipation created through silence is so powerful, even our naval forces have tapped into the hidden potential of silence and have developed a weapon to stop people from talking.
It is also common knowledge that couples who can spend their time in silence (and still feel as if they have had the best conversation ever) will always stay together. However, to some people, silence can be downright scary. There is term for this phobia: Sedatephobia.
They may feel insecure and take your actions personally. They could be confused by someone not “participating" since they have no interaction, reciprocation, influence on you, or “confirmation” of their own reality through you.
If someone does not want to participate in gossip or opine on trivial matters, that does not mean that the person is rude. It just means that the individual doesn't see a point to all the tommyrot. Silence is not rude; rather, silence is a language of the wise that they prefer over the foolish tittle-tattle.
Introverts get annoyed by small talk. Since conversations require energy, they often prefer conversations that allow them to go deeper in their relationships with other people. Small talk and vapid conversations about the weather and current events can seem tedious, draining, and even annoying.
You've hurt their feelings, and they're avoiding confrontation. They have social anxiety at the moment (due to crowds, loud noises, bright lights, or a combination thereof). They are questioning whether or not they trust you. The Introvert is working on creative or personal projects and doesn't want to be distracted.
Weaknesses: social anxiety, shyness, navigating a predominantly extroverted world.
Silence may be a part of our personality, certainly, but it may also be a coping mechanism that has prevented us from properly expressing and confronting emotions and feelings. We push the feelings down and replace them with substances to extinguish them.
For DISTRACTION. Clinical Psychologist, Jenna Carl, said “Background noise may be used in an attempt to distract from or avoid unpleasant emotions and thoughts.” You could be using music or noise as a coping skill. Juulia Karlstedt is a counselor who specializes in anxiety and perfectionism.
People with sedatephobia would find it completely impossible to manage without constant noise and this can cause problems with insomnia, social interaction, and in their work where they might find it hard to concentrate.
People are intimidated by the silence.
People act rather wary and cautious around you. They tend to leave you alone, as if your silence has placed an uncrossable void around you. I mean, sometimes it's funny, but sometimes it's kind of irritating.
Their objectivity and the ability to be less likely to be affected by certain emotional cues make an introvert to appear intimidating to other people and make them likely to be manipulated or swayed.
It's not that introverts enjoy awkward silences. Introverts tend to need time to think before speaking. This could range from a few extra milliseconds to a few days.
Silence is scary not just because it's unfamiliar, but also because it opens the door to a whole bunch of thoughts, sensations, and emotions that noise keeps at bay. As Steven puts it, silence can be like “getting locked in a room with your harshest critic.”
Negative Silence: Awkward & Excruciating
Most people are familiar with awkward, uncomfortable silences, the kind of silence that means no one came prepared, or that people are unwilling to respond to a question. People are also all too familiar with the silence of being ignored. I think of these as negative silences.
If someone displays unmanageable emotions and easily flies off the handle, this is a serious red flag. Responding with uncontrollable rage or the "silent treatment" could point to abusive (physical or emotional) behavior in the future, says Trombetti.
Being an introvert doesn't affect how friendly you may be. Some people may think that introverts are unfriendly because they don't tend to have large groups of friends, and they may reflect on situations quietly rather than joining in on conversations at gatherings. Introverts can't be leaders.
An introvert can cut off contact with someone for any number of reasons, but mainly it's because that individual is negatively affecting us, and we need to slam the door in order to heal. It's about self-care and setting boundaries (which is not easy, trust me).