Polybius (12.6b. 8-9) claims that plural marriage had been practiced at Sparta for a long time and that it was common for multiple brothers to share the same wife. Additionally, once a husband had enough children of his own, it was customary for him to give his wife to another man.
Spartan marriage lacked the ceremony of Athens. Spartan women would be willfully captured and dressed as a man, also having her hair shaved as a man would. In this attire the bride would be laid alone in the dark where a sober groom would sneak in, remove her belt, and carry her to bed.
Marriage was very important in Sparta. Spartan women and men were encouraged to marry and would be shamed if they did not.
Unlike girls in other city-states who might marry as young as 13 or 14, a Spartan woman usually continued her education until 18 or 20 and only then considered proposals by suitors brokered by her father or older brother.
In preparation for marriage, Spartan women had their heads shaved; they kept their hair short after they wed. Married couples typically lived apart, as men under 30 were required to continue residing in communal barracks. In order to see their wives during this time, husbands had to sneak away at night.
Marriage in Sparta
Women were around the age of 18-20 and men were usually in their mid-twenties when they married. According to Plutarch in his Life of Lycurgus, in preparation for the marriage ritual, the bride would "cut her hair off close to the head" and "put a man's cloak and sandals on" (book 15, section 3.)
As Spartan men dedicated much of their lives to the army, the women did not just stay home raising children. They conducted business affairs on behalf of their husbands and could own property. And, unlike in other areas of Greece, they had the legal right to divorce their husbands too.
Girls in Sparta were raised to be strong and healthy, just like the boys. They received an education in physical fitness, athletics, and combat skills, which included activities such as running, wrestling, and throwing the javelin.
Spartan men were not allowed to live with their wives until age 30. Spartan society didn't discourage romantic love, but marriage and childrearing were both subject to some peculiar cultural and governmental constraints. The state counseled that men should marry at age 30 and women at 20.
In cities such as Sparta and Thebes, there appeared to be a particularly strong emphasis on relationships between men and youths, and it was considered an important part of their education.
In Athens and Sparta, homosexuality was practiced to various degrees, and its status was somewhat “complicated,” according to Plato's Pausanias. In Thebes, on the other hand, it was actively encouraged, and even legally incentivized.
Unlike other Greek women, Spartan women had equal rights with men, except for voting rights. Since men were in the military and often away from home, the women had full authority over their households. In 404 B.C. the Spartan army was able to conquer Athens during the Peloponnesian War.
Most young Greek women would be married at about the age of fourteen to a man roughly twice their age. Prior to the marriage ceremony the couple would probably have met only a few times, and while the bride would normally be a virgin, the husband almost certainly was not.
Marriages were usually arranged by the fathers of the couple, often to increase the family's finances and/or to improve their social standing; few, if any, married for love. Until a young woman was married, she was formally under the guardianship of her father. Once married, her husband became her “kyrios” (“master”).
Marriage in ancient Sparta
According the state's customs, it was recommended that men marry at age 30 and women at 20. Because men were required to live in the communal barracks until age 30, couples who married earlier were forced to live separately until the husband turned 30.
It is widely agreed that the origin of marriage dates well before recorded history, but the earliest recorded evidence of marriage ceremonies uniting one woman and one man dates from about 2350 B.C. in the Far East.
Once a Spartan man reached the age of 30, he was allowed to start a family. He was expected to remain physically fit throughout adulthood; he served in the military and continued to receive training until age 60. Only then was he allowed to retire from military service. All Spartan men trained and served as warriors.
A Spartan man was considered to have graduated from the agōgē at age 30, at which time he was expected to have been accepted into a syssition and was permitted to have a family. He would also receive a kleros, an allotment of land farmed by helots.
In Sparta, girls were started their education around the same age as boys (between 6-7 years of age). The education system was concentrated on military preparation and girls had a similar education. They also received physical education, which combined wrestling, gymnastics and combat skills.
Spartan girls participated in the same physical fitness routines as the boys when young, even training with them at first, and were then educated in reading, writing, and mousike ("music") a term which included singing, dance, playing a musical instrument, and composing poetry.
Spartan men under the age of thirty were not permitted to live with their wives, instead they were expected to live communally with other members of their syssitia. Due to the husband's absence, women were expected to run the household largely alone.
Its never been said that the Spartan augmentations made them sterile, however their sex drives were severely reduced. However, technically speaking they should be able to have a child. The child should turn out to be a regular human unless the augmentations include tampering with DNA.
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