Losing a best friend at a young age may feel disorienting and even traumatic, while losing a best friend as an adult may trigger a wide range of emotions. As a parent, be prepared to support your child through their grief. As an adult, be patient with yourself as you navigate a new world without your friend.
The loss of a close friend can spiral us into depression with feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and helplessness. If we believe we have enough friends to meet our needs, we cope with stress better. The loss of a friend shakes that belief and rocks our emotional foundation (King, A. R. et al., 2016).
We know that survivors often experience depression or anxiety after the death of someone close. We don't usually think about them having posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), but it can also happen, especially after a catastrophic death.
Losing a best friend may hurt more deeply than other friendships or relationships. Often this is because your best friend and you shared a special bond. You may have told them things you have never shared with anyone else. You may trust them more than anyone else in your life.
02/8It's a sheer emotional bond
You might feel closer to your partner after having sex, being cuddled or kissed but the bond you develop with your best friend that is sans any physical attraction. When you part your ways with your bestie, it is the loss of the emotional connect that you mourn the most.
Quite often, we associate post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) with extremely traumatic events in our lives, but the loss of a friendship that we thought would fulfill us can also be extremely jarring and traumatic. Friendship PTSD is often caused by friendships that have ended suddenly and badly.
Losing a close friend can be even more painful than a romantic breakup. It is possible to heal from the loss; as you work through the pain, you'll become even stronger.
Common Feelings After Losing a Best Friend
The five stages of grief is a framework that includes denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. After losing a best friend, you may experience some or all of these feelings.
There is no timeline for how long grief lasts, or how you should feel after a particular time. After 12 months it may still feel as if everything happened yesterday, or it may feel like it all happened a lifetime ago. These are some of the feelings you might have when you are coping with grief longer-term.
While many people won't go on to experience Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD or C-PTSD), an analysis from the World Health Organisation's 'World Mental Health Survey' found there was a 5.2% risk of people developing PTSD or C-PTSD after they found out about the unexpected death of someone they love.
“According to the American Psychological Association, trauma is an emotional response to a terrible event. Trauma can occur once, or on multiple occasions and an individual can experience more than one type of trauma.” PTSD is the mental health disorder that is associated when someone experiences or witnesses a trauma.
The five stages, denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance are a part of the framework that makes up our learning to live with the one we lost. They are tools to help us frame and identify what we may be feeling. But they are not stops on some linear timeline in grief.
Friendship breakups are so hard because we don't get the same permission to process grief around a friendship. We struggle to reconcile how we feel toward the loss with how society says we should feel. We grieve in community; others acknowledge the weight of our loss, and it helps us heal.
Society sees friendships as far less important than love and life partnerships. But psychologists warn that the end of a close friendship can leave the "grieving" side in need of therapy. The end of friendships can lead to heartbreak and grief like with any other relationship.
“Try to let go of negative feelings and focus on the positive aspects of your friendship.” “You can also forgive and then steer clear of them in the future if you feel it's in your best interest,” says Hong.
At times, one person may need more than the other. But if a friend is constantly a taker and rarely a giver, it's not a balanced friendship. If you're always there for them but they don't do the same for you, it may be a sign to move on.
It is perfectly normal that you are grieving the loss of this friend and you probably will always remember her and miss her. However, you know that life has to be lived and you will move on as we all do.
According to a study from Oxford University, men and women start losing friends around the age of 25. Making new friends and maintaining friendships gets harder each year we get older.
Obviously, most people don't meet all of their friends during childhood and, unfortunately, not all friendships last forever. The poll found that the average friendship lasts for 17 years, however, 17 percent say they've had the same best friend for over 30 years!
Turns out, of the 76 percent of respondents who said they'd struck up a relationship with their best friend, 29 percent resulted in marriage. Sadly, only 51 percent got their best friend back if the relationship went sour.
“Trauma dumping is the unfiltered sharing of strong emotions or upsetting experiences without permission from the listener.” When someone experiences any of the many types of trauma, they often feel overwhelmed and seek relief by sharing their story. Unfortunately, this can backfire.
As with any abusive relationship, a victim of a trauma-bonded friendship may begin to lose themselves over time. During the love bombing phase, they may have blown off other friends to spend time with their abuser. However, towards the end, it may look more like isolation and disconnection from old friends and family.