The first good news is that Santa Claus does not really care about what you or your children believe, and he will not be upset and will not punish you if you don't believe in him. So there is no harm in not believing.
While there are many benefits to protecting children's belief in Santa, it's not OK to lie to children about his existence. Most children have a positive reaction to their Santa discovery. Discovering the truth about Santa is part of growing up and a sign that the child is developing critical thinking skills.
Santa is real in the sense that he was an actual person. Otherwise known as Saint Nicholas, his story goes all the way back to the 3rd century. He was a monk who was born in 280 A.D. in modern-day Turkey. As an only child, he was given great affection by his parents.
Research suggests it's bad practice to lie to children. Dr Justin Coulson, one of Australia's leading parenting experts, – "If you want to do Santa that's fine, but let the kids know Santa was based on a historical figure who may or may not have done the things that we think he did".
Simply explain to your child that the gifts are purchased and wrapped by mom and dad, and that you share in the magic of Christmas as a family by spreading joy. Let them know that the Santa they see in the store is someone paid to sit and give children the joy of believing in something magical.
"There is no such thing as being too old to believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy," Kelman tells Yahoo Life. "Letting kids figure it out on their own is preferable to parents breaking the news to them.
Overall, the average age in the United States for no longer believing in Santa Claus is 8.4 years old. Mississippi has the oldest average age at 10.2 years old. Not far behind is Iowa where the average age is 9.9 years old. Rounding out the top five oldest are Montana (9.8), and Hawaii (9.5).
"It's not an overnight shift in thinking," says Laura Lamminen, Ph. D., a pediatric psychologist at Children's Health℠, "and there's no set age where children should know the truth about Santa Claus." Dr. Lamminen says each family and each child within that family will be ready to talk about Santa at different ages.
If you're wondering if your kids are still expecting Santa to bring their presents this year, most have stopped believing in Old St Nick by the age of eight, according to the first international academic "Santa survey," while many parents wished that they still believed in Father Christmas even as adults.
Some tweens hold onto their childhood beliefs for as long as they possibly can. The truth is that if your children are asking questions like "Is Santa real?", they probably already know the truth or have an idea about the reality of the tradition. They may just be looking for validation from you.
Because the Elf on the Shelf “moves” each night, belief can sometimes be suspended into thinking that it is real. And for all intents and purposes, the Elf on the Shelf is real. It's a real doll, after all.
Santa advises that no family member touch their Elf on the Shelf, but he does describe a few rare instances when an adult may use tongs or potholders to help an elf in an urgent situation. Parents: read on to learn about special, few and far between cases where emergency help will be required.
If you do spread that lie to your kid, you are far from alone. Research shows that the vast majority of American parents promote a false belief in Santa Claus, and most small children accept that story as real. In fact, research shows that most parents work very hard to perpetuate the myth of Santa.
Say something like this, “The Santa that you see in books, movies, and in stores is a person in a costume. People dress up in Santa costumes to remind us… …of someone who lived a long, long time ago called St. Nicholas who secretly gave money to people who needed it.”
Normal process. No longer believing in Santa is a normal stage in a child's development. At around 4 or 5 years old, many children start asking questions. They seem to be a little skeptical about the plausibility of the character's existence.
The Age Most Kids Figure It Out
In most cases, eight or nine is the age that children stop believing in Santa, but not for the reasons you'd think. While most parents would probably blame their child's peers for blowing the whistle, it actually has more to do with the normal development of a child's brain.
Half (49%) of Americans say they stopped believing in Santa before the age of 10 – with a quarter (23%) reporting that they lost sight of him between the ages of seven (10%) and eight (13%).
Because Santa is synonymous with childhood, the belief in him must go away at one point or another if we want our kids to grow up. There's no specific age, necessarily.
While there is no perfect age to have this conversation, it is generally best to wait for your child to ask you first. Often, parents start noticing their children becoming skeptical around eight years old, but this can vary.
While everyone is different, according to a recent poll by House Method, the average age kids in the United States stop believing in Santa Claus is 8.5 years. So, chances are good that somewhere around then is the right age for your child to learn the true story about Santa Claus.
In interviews, 85 percent of 4-year-olds said that they believed in Santa, 65 percent of 6-year-olds said that they believed, and 25 percent of 8-year-olds said that they believed. Those numbers were published in a small study in the American Journal of Orthopsychiatry in 1978.
According to Pyschologies.co.uk, Santaphobia is most common in children under four years old. In most cases, once children get to 5 years, they lose their fear and start to get wholly excited again. As toddlers, our little ones are starting to feel emotions in completely different ways to what they've ever experienced.