Emotionally unstable personality disorder causes significantly impaired functioning, including a feeling of emptiness, lack of identity, unstable mood and relationships, intense fear of abandonment and dangerous impulsive behaviour, including severe episodes of self-harm.
We're depleted Over time, mothers become physically, emotionally and mentally drained of nutrients, strength and vitality. Psychologist Rick Hanson coined the phrase “depleted mother syndrome” and emphasizes how important it is to regain the strength we need to be there for ourselves and to manage our care-giving role.
2) The Unpredictable Mother
The unpredictable mother is overwhelmed by feelings and her parenting style is based purely on mood. This mother can create problems, issues and crises in her own mind, through emotions and relationships, passing them on to the children.
The High Conflict Institute defines a high conflict parent as someone who lacks the ability to have insight into their own behavior; who doesn't have the ability to reflect on their actions and who blames others for everything that has gone wrong.
Traits of a Narcissistic Mother
A narcissistic mother will display traits characteristic of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). They view their children as an extension of themselves and only invest in a child's well-being to the extent that it enhances their own.
Mommy issues can result from both overly permissive and overprotective mothers. Some mothers are more focused on being their child's best friend rather than providing solid, structured maternal leadership and emotional support.
Signs that your parent is emotionally unavailable
They respond to children's emotions with impatience or indifference. They avoid or prevent discussion of negative emotions. They're dismissive or overwhelmed when the child has an emotional need.
What Is Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD)? BPD, if left untreated, can severely impact a person's life behavior, self-image and stress-related thinking. Thus, it is commonly associated with issues like relationship, work, and school problems.
The mother wound is the cultural trauma that is carried by a mother – along with any dysfunctional coping mechanisms that have been used to process that pain – and inherited by her children (with daughters generally bearing the brunt of this burden).
If a female child has mommy issues, it's more typically referencing that a mother nitpicked or verbally put down their daughter. This can lead to self-confidence and self-image issues later in life. It can also lead to trust issues since the person that you trusted for your primary care let you down in this way.
A daughter's need for her mother's love is a primal driving force that doesn't diminish with unavailability. Wounds may include lack of confidence and trust, difficulty setting boundaries, and being overly sensitive. Daughters of unloving mothers may unwittingly replicate the maternal bond in other relationships.
Being raised by an emotionally unavailable parent or guardian can lead to a life of unstable friendships, strings of failed relationships, emotional neediness, an inability to self-regulate, provide for yourself, and identity confusion.
Invalidation happens when parents start addressing it wrongly, destroying a child's concept of it and forming a kind of emotional invalidation. If you're one of them growing up, you've started hiding these emotions because your parents made it clear that it's wrong to feel that way.
Daughters of emotionally absent mothers find it extremely challenging to build healthy adult relationships, especially with other females. There is a lack of trust and fear of abandonment. They become armored, wary and defensive. They feel too ashamed to share why they act and react like they do.
A boy with mommy issues may reject his partner when she comes to what he considers to be too close. An avoidant attachment style, fear of intimacy and stonewalling are also common problems for a boy with mommy issues. Spotting these red flags, in the beginning, is essential to making healthy relationship decisions.
Excessive attachment of a mother, also known as “enmeshment,” can occur when a mother becomes overly involved in her child's life and has difficulty separating her identity from that of her child.
A narcissistic mother may feel entitled or self-important, seek admiration from others, believe she is above others, lack empathy, exploit her children, put others down, experience hypersensitivity to criticism, believe she deserves special treatment, and worst of all, maybe naïve to the damage she is causing.
While the narcissistic mother gets off on the power she holds over others, including her children, the controlling mother really believes that without her intervention, the children would fail at just about everything. She's motivated by fear, but masquerades her control as a form of strength.
Mothers with BPD may oscillate between over-involved, intrusive behaviors and withdrawn, avoidant behaviors. These behaviors may also manifest as oscillations between hostile control and coldness.
If your daughter feels unloved, she may suffer from several emotional problems. Symptoms can include depression, anxiety, self-harm, and more. These feelings are often the result of the way her parents treated her during her childhood.