One of the most common ways people discover they've been lied to is from third-party information. Deception done for the right reasons is not really deception. What is meant by the phrase "deception can serve as a social lubricant?" -People commonly engage in deception to get what they want from other people.
The polygraph is the best-known technique for psychophysiological detection of deception. The goal of all of these techniques is to detect deception by analyzing signals of changes in the body that cannot normally be detected by human observation.
Content. Pay attention to what they are saying. Phrases like “honestly,” “I want to be honest with you,” or “here's the truth” can all be signs that the liar is trying too hard to convince the other person that they are telling the truth. Using buffer words such as “like” and “um” can indicate lying.
Vocal tone is a powerful indicator of emotion – research has shown that a person's vocal tone will waver from the baseline in up to 95 percent of all deceptive statements.
While some people who lie want to protect the feelings of others and spare someone else pain or hurt, many people lie to protect their own feelings, self-esteem, self-confidence, or other personal emotion. A woman who says, "I didn't want that job anyway," when she really did, is lying to protect herself.
Some researchers estimate that the average person tells around 1-2 lies per day. However, other studies have found much higher numbers - some suggest that people tell closer to 10-15 lies per day on average.
The eyes: Someone who is lying might stare or look away at a crucial moment, says Glass — a possible sign they're moving their eyes around as they try to think about what to say next. The research conducted by Geiselman at UCLA corroborated this, finding that people sometimes look away briefly when lying.
The direction of their eyes: A 2012 study published in Plos One debunked the myth people look to the left when lying. A study by the University of Michigan found when participants lied, they maintained eye contact 70% of the time.
Tightened jaw and forehead
Liars also tend to tense up when they're not being truthful, and this can include tightening the jaw and forehead. Both are connected to the "mental effort and stress" associated with telling a lie, according to Wenner.
Interviewers can enhance their ability to detect deception by focusing on four areas of nonverbal behaviors: comfort/discomfort, emphasis, synchrony, and perception management.
There are many signs someone could be lying. For example, one may make too little or too much eye contact, sweat or flush in their face, fidget or enact unusual gestures, have trouble maintaining normal speech patterns, and have difficulty controlling the volume and tone of their voice.
In the literature on cues to deception, as in everyday life, lies about personal feelings, facts, and attitudes are the most common- place. Participants in studies of deception might lie about their opinions on social issues, for example, or about their academic interests or musical preferences.
They alter our reality, reframing it through the agenda of the person who doesn't want the truth to come out. Being lied to makes you feel insecure – your version of the truth is discredited. It also makes you feel unimportant – the person lying to you didn't value you enough to tell the truth.
There is a developmental progression to lying. At the first level, the child wants to achieve some goal or reward by saying something that she knows or believes to be false. Her intention may be to affect the listener's behavior — to avoid punishment or receive a reward, for example.
The three most commonly referred to are lies of commission, lies of omission, and lies of influence, aka character lies.
For example, when confronted about something, they may reply with a murky statement such as "Would I do such a thing?" or even "I wouldn't do such a thing," rather than a straightforward "I didn't do it." Another indication of deception is using unnecessary words in a statement that make its meaning less clear.