I am asked this question more than almost any other question about polyamory. My short answer – yes, it is possible. However, to make a polyamorous /monogamous relationship work takes partners who are secure in themselves and their choices, secure in the relationship, good communicators and willing to work.
To be polyamorous means to have open intimate or romantic relationships with more than one person at a time.
One partner may have come out as polyamorous after the relationship was already established, and the couple came to the conclusion that the poly person will have multiple relationships, while the mono person does not. And, this can work. In fact, it is a very common place to land for the Mono/Poly couple.
Polycule: A polycule is the group of all the people who are somehow connected through the romantic relationships they are in. This doesn't mean that they all have to be dating each other.
At its core, solo polyamory refers to people who are open to dating or engaging in multiple meaningful relationships without having a 'primary partner': one person to whom they're committed above all other partners.
If you've had crushes on multiple people since you were young and have trouble choosing between them (think Devi in "Never Have I Ever"), you might be polyamorous. Many polyamorous people feel they have an infinite amount of love to give others, so it's normal to feel like you can love mutiple people at once.
Well, you can, but chances are it isn't going to go very well because the “rules” of monogamy, which are about exclusivity and allegiance to one person, don't apply. Polyamory requires creating new relationship parameters that are agreed upon by all.
Kitchen Table Polyamory (KTP) refers to 'a style of polyamorous relationship in which the interrelationship of a network, and the integration of multiple romantic relationships into one life or group, is prioritised,' explains Jordan Dixon, a clinical sex and relationships psychotherapist.
A mono-poly relationship is one where one partner identifies as polyamorous and the other partner identifies as monogamous.
Nesting Partner: Partner you live with and likely share bills with - can be a "primary partner," but not necessarily. Anchor Partner: Partner you probably have logistical ties with, most likely live with, perhaps have the deepest or longest term emotional ties with - sometimes called "primary partner"
A survey of 340 polyamorous adults shows their polyam relationships lasting an average of eight years. The most typical polyam relationship involves a primary committed couple, with each member free to explore other relationships.
“An open relationship is one where one or both partners have a desire for sexual relationships outside of each other, and polyamory is about having intimate, loving relationships with multiple people,” says Renee Divine, L.M.F.T., a sex and relationships therapist in Minneapolis, MN.
Lap-Sitting Poly
But it's a very specific type. I would call it “lap-sitting poly.” Essentially, one in which you're expected to not only be comfortable enough to be sitting at the kitchen table with your metamour, but instead, you're expected to sit on their lap (either as a best friend or a lover).
As with monogamous relationships, polyamorous relationships can be healthy or unhealthy — happy or unhappy — depending on the behaviors and actions of the people who engage in them. Many people in polyamorous relationships are satisfied and happy.
Vee. When one person is in a relationship or dating two people who are not involved with each other, that's a vee polyamorous relationship. The easiest way to understand this type of polyamory is to think of the letter V.
Specifically, polyamory can take the forms of a triad of three people in an intimate relationship, a poly family of more than three people, one person as the pivot point of a relationship (a "vee"), a couple in a two-person relationship which portrays other relationships on their own, and various other intimate ...
A survey of 340 polyamorous adults shows their polyam relationships lasting an average of eight years. The most typical polyam relationship involves a primary committed couple, with each member free to explore other relationships.
Other researchers like Fleckenstein and Cox found that most polyamorous people maintain two or at the most three partnerships simultaneously.
Successful polyamorous relationships require open communcation and honesty about your wants and needs. This includes listening to your partner's wants and needs.
Finally, polyamory has also been described as a distinctive identity (M Barker, 2005). I will discuss poly identity narratives in more detail, because representations of polyamory as identity most strongly resemble sexual orientation discourses.
Ambiamorous is a term that typically refers to individuals who enjoy both monoamory as well as polyamory. Ambiamorous people generally have little or no preference between either one. They may express feelings towards only one partner or multiple partners at the same time.
Unicorn/Dragon:a bisexual, polyamorous woman/man who is open to forming a triad with an established couple; referred to as these mythical creatures because these type of partners are extremely rare.
A closed triad is where the poly relationship involves the poly triad and no outside partners. These three individuals form an intimate relationship where they are committed to each other and don't seek external partners.