Emotional abuse is a form of trauma, and trauma is well-established as a serious physical and mental health concern. The number-one reason manipulators prey on your emotions is because that is the quickest and most efficient way to get what they want from you—and to maintain that relationship for the long run.
The person manipulating — called the manipulator — seeks to create an imbalance of power, and take advantage of a victim to get power, control, benefits, and/or privileges at the expense of the victim. Manipulation can happen in close or casual relationships, but they are more common in closely formed relationships.
Emotional manipulation is scary because it can make you doubt everything about yourself: Your worth, your beliefs, even your own perceptions. Emotional manipulators do sometimes have real feelings for you. But their behavior makes that irrelevant in most cases.
Emotional blackmail. Emotional blackmail is what it's called, but most people know it as guilt-tripping and blame-shifting. This is really insidious because they end up getting you to take the blame for their wrongdoings.
Is it best to ignore a manipulator? Yes, you should ignore your manipulator and not react to everything they are saying. They have studied your triggers and expect you to respond to their bait. If you continue ignoring them, they will eventually come around or go away from your life.
They are afraid of vulnerability. Manipulators seldom express their needs, desires, or true feelings. They seek out the vulnerabilities in others in order to take advantage of them for their own benefits and deflect their true motives. They have no ability to love, empathy, guilt, remorse, or conscience.
Manipulative people tend to sway personal opinions, always see their side of the situation, and may never let you have your own opinion because they are always pushing theirs. These toxic individuals tend to play the victim, never taking responsibility for their actions or any actions for that matter.
“When you are being manipulated by someone you are being psychologically coerced into doing something you probably don't really want to do,” she says. You might feel scared to do it, obligated to do it, or guilty about not doing it.
They use your feelings against you
If you're upset, someone who is manipulating you may try to make you feel guilty for your feelings. They may accuse you of being unreasonable or not being adequately invested. For example: “If you really loved me, you'd never question me.”
While anyone can be manipulated, expert manipulators tend to target people with and take advantage of certain personality traits. These traits include: The desire to be liked or to please; these people are more likely to take extraordinary measures to gain favor. Low self-esteem.
Apply fogging
The goal of fogging is to calmly acknowledge part of the criticism without making any commitments to change. For example, you could say, “I agree that …” or “You are right in that …” without making a big deal about it and then exit the conversation.
“A manipulative person will generally not respond well to heart-to-heart talks about what you are experiencing; a conversation with a manipulator will often leave you more confused and second-guessing yourself. As such, ghosting a manipulator can be a very smart tactic.”
Basically, the silent treatment is a passive-aggressive behavior by which an abuser communicates some sort of negative message to the intended victim that only the perpetrator and the victim recognize through nonverbal communication.
You will never resolve anything that way. Giving in to deflection and letting the other person off the hook may give them control in the moment, but ultimately creates more anxiety because they know deep down that they are avoiding consequences that are going to catch up with them at some point.
Manipulation is generally considered a dishonest form of social influence as it is used at the expense of others. Manipulative tendencies may derive from personality disorders such as borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, or antisocial personality disorder.