Autism dating can be quite a daunting and challenging part of growing up for both the people with autism and their parents. People that are on the autism spectrum often misread body language, lack scripting and appropriate skills to initiate relationships, and cannot always communicate what is on their minds.
Because people with autism often have difficulty reading social cues, managing sensory needs, and expressing feelings, relationships that involve dating someone with autism spectrum disorder someone can be particularly challenging to navigate.
Nevertheless, autistic adults may need to hurdle far more obstacles than their neurotypical peers to thrive in a world of dating. Some autistic adults go through their entire adult life without having much interest in romance or dating, while others are very interested and actively pursue romantic relationships.
We can date people who aren't on the autism spectrum.
Often a misconception is that people on the spectrum want to only date others who are on the spectrum. This couldn't be farther from the truth. We just want to find someone we connect with and can be ourselves with.
How Does Autism Affect Intimacy in Sexual Relationships? Intimacy is the sharing of emotional, cognitive, and physical aspects of oneself with those of another individual. People with autism often have problems with rigidity and the need for repetition, which may limit the spontaneity and playfulness of sexual contact.
Some people with autism don't instinctively think to give kisses or hugs and tell you they love you, so their partner often has to be the one to initiate these things. As they learn, they'll get better at consciously deciding to do these things on their own.
Relationship status
Although researchers have largely debunked the myth that autistic people tend not to be interested in romantic relationships, they have found that autistic people are more likely than neurotypical people to be single.
Key points. Widespread stereotypes suggest that people with autism are incapable of feeling romantic love. In reality, people with autism can experience romantic love and often attach considerable value to their close relationships.
Love is a complex emotion that even neurotypical people have a hard time understanding. So, can people with autism fall in love? The answer may surprise you. Some researchers believe that people with autism are actually more capable of experiencing deep and meaningful love than neurotypical people.
One concept that alludes many autistics is flirting. It is a challenge because they're often very literal. When someone is flirting, they do or say things, that in a literal sense, don't make sense. This non-literal behavior can be very challenging for neurodiverse adults to understand.
They may show love, for example, through a practical act, and tidy up for you, or iron your shirt, rather than through a more neurotypical way of looking at you and telling you or using physical affection.
People with autism may get easily attached to people, leading them to become over-friendly. It can be difficult to understand other people's perceptions of situations, therefore what they feel is appropriate, may be considered as socially unacceptable.
The pressure to date causes many individuals with autism to move too fast in relationships. Sometimes, the pressure to date causes neurodiverse individuals to enter into relationships too quickly and not fully vet the partner they are dating.
Individuals with autism can also have an aversion to touch. Touch can cause a lack of emotional response or may even cause emotional stress and turmoil. Touch aversion in autism can feel uncomfortable for friends and family who are unfamiliar with this common response.
Autistic teenagers develop romantic feelings just as other children the same age do. Visual supports and social stories can help autistic teenagers recognise attraction and negotiate romantic relationships.
About 35% of autistic people are married, though such figures don't always take into account people that aren't diagnosed or have received a potential misdiagnosis.
Another reason is that alone time gives them a place to recharge. When your child can reset alone, they can process their emotions and thoughts better. For many autistic kids, it's a stress release to be alone, a time to shed whatever anxious thoughts built up during the day.
Considering this evidence for autistic people's different experience of touch, it is no wonder that autistic children may avoid touch or only engage in touch under certain conditions. It has been reported that autistic children engage in cuddles less than non-autistic peers (Baranek, 1999).
Many people with autism crave intimacy and love. But, they don't know how to achieve it in a romantic relationship. They can feel blind to everyday subtle social cues from their partner. This can cause conflict and hurt feelings.
These traits can include anything from jealousy to anger issues to anxiety — anything that seems to be getting in the way of a satisfying relationship. Again, this doesn't just apply to the autistic person in the relationship. Both people should be willing to admit when their own traits and habits are a problem.
They might not like talking that much and prefer to keep to themselves. On the other hand, some people with autism might overshare and might not know when to let the other person have a turn to talk. People with autism might also struggle to share what they are thinking or feeling with other people.