It's possible that he is feeling scared by his own emotions and doesn't know how to handle them. He'll be “hot” because he does want to move things forward with you, but then he'll pull back and go “cold” because the feelings are too intense for him.
Stay calm, confront but don't accuse. You have every right to find out why he's gone from hot to cold. If he opens up, the conversation could bring you closer. If he refuses to share his feelings and stays distant, then it's time to move on.
Why does he act interested one minute and distant the next?
He needs some time to be sure of his feelings. Sometimes, guys withdraw from a situation and act uninvolved to be able to see it from a different perspective. By keeping a distance from you, he is trying to see the relationship differently and understand if he really wants to keep this going.
Some people may act in a 'hot and cold' manner out of insecurity, fear of commitment, or as a manipulative tactic to keep the other person interested. It should be treated as a relationship deal breaker. Hot and Cold emotional treatment can become part of a pattern of toxic red flags such as Negging or Ghosting.
Another reason why guys act distant when they like you is because they feel you are above their level. He may feel you are too beautiful or classy for him to date. He won't have the courage to ask you out or make his feelings evident in such a situation.
The Ultimate Reason Men Are Hot And Cold (LADIES MUST WATCH THIS TO PREPARE THEMSELVES!)
27 related questions found
Why do guys give mixed signals?
“Usually, it's used to create distance,” Feuerman says. “It's a way to say, 'I'm not totally sure I am into your or not. ' Or, 'I'm not sure if we want the same thing here.” Either way, mixed signals can be used to slow down the pace of the relationship without actually talking about it. (Cue eyeroll.)
When a guy acts interested, then backs off, the reason has less likely to do with you and more to do with him. His past experiences could be coming in the way of your romantic dreams. Maybe, he has been abused, cheated on, or deeply hurt by a partner before, and thus, has his guards high up.
He may like you but find it too overwhelming to pursue a relationship—or maybe he's just emotionally unavailable. It's possible past experiences have colored his current outlook. He may just need time to overcome those experiences—but don't cross your fingers. He might be afraid to let someone in.
One clear power move that a man will do to you when he's trying to test your patience? He'll ignore you for days at a time, not giving you any updates on where he is, what he's been up to, or whether or not he's even still alive.
How do guys act when they are falling in love and are scared?
His behavior may seem a little detached, disinterested, reticent, or withdrawn. Well, some men could be afraid of heartbreak, embarrassment, or rejection. Though he likes you, his fears may not let him come close to you. Therefore, he may find reasons to avoid a relationship.
Maybe he has family or personal issues going on, or maybe there is a situation at work that is bothering him. There could be even something in the relationship that he is stressed out about. He could also want the support, but not know how to talk to you about it at all.
What happens when you stop chasing a man? He starts to miss you. No more frequent random calls or text messages to catch his attention, and he starts to miss them. He will figure out he enjoyed the attention you gave him and the feeling that somebody out there cared for him.
To disarm a manipulator, postpone your answer to give yourself time to ponder, question their intent, look disinterested by not reacting, establish boundaries and say no firmly, maintain your self-respect by not apologizing when they blame you for their problems, and apply fogging to acknowledge any mistakes and end ...
Why do guys come on strong and then pull away? They might feel overwhelmed by the intensity of your feelings, or are afraid of commitment. They might even think that you two are no longer compatible or have started seeing someone else.
A healthy relationship is where both partners have enough time and space for themselves. Hence, if you are struggling to figure out ways to keep your man interested, remember this golden rule – give him and yourself space, and allow him to feel your absence.
