In fact, narcissists prefer to target someone who is strong-willed, and who has talents or characteristics they admire, because they believe it makes them shine too. "Narcissists are drawn to those who can boost their own self-esteem and validate their sense of importance," Wasser told Insider.
A common misconception is that narcissists go for the weak, because they are easier to manipulate. In fact, narcissists prefer to try and hook someone in who is strong-willed, and who has talents or characteristics they admire. That way, they feel more accomplished if they succeed in tearing them down.
In addition, the narcissist sees the strong woman as a conquest. It provides him with a sense of being equal or worthy of having a relationship with someone successful, independent, and strong.
It is a misconception that narcissists target weak, vulnerable people because they will be easier to manipulate. They actually go for the exact opposite. They look for people who are confident, successful, attractive and strong-willed.
Narcissists tend to target those they believe they can easily exploit or those who will go along with the narcissist's dysfunction. They can easily sense someone who is self-conscious or appears to have low self-esteem, mainly by their body language and how they present themselves in public and intimate conversations.
A closet (or covert) narcissist is the type who does not want to be seen to be openly chasing the limelight, so they tend to choose victims who makes them look good by association. They'll usually go for successful people - those with high status who others admire.
They want to see how much they can destroy you
Narcissists thrive on chaos, so they do not act out of jealousy, as that would imply they want your relationships, career, wealth, or health for themselves. Rather, they just don't want to see other people happy.
Type As can also be dangerous to narcissists
Although they can be targeted, type A people can also become a narcissist's worst nightmare. One of the most important defenses against dark personalities is having strong boundaries yourself, and type A people are usually aware they have the right to build them.
A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.
Although narcissists act superior, entitled and boastful, underneath their larger-than-life facade lies their greatest fear: That they are ordinary. For narcissists, attention is like oxygen. Narcissists believe only special people get attention.
Narcissists often look for victims who struggle with insecurity and low self-esteem. People who think less of themselves and struggle with the “I am not enough” mindset tend to attract toxic partners. People with self-esteem issues tend to think of themselves as imperfect or unlovable.
They will often deploy a variety of narcissistic relationship patterns such as manipulation, charismatic, and exploitational tactics in order to ensure that their own needs and wants are met. As a spouse, you may be the subject of their manipulation and abuse, while your partner treats everyone else positively.
Narcissists are said to be envious of others and yet believe others to be envious of them; they will often project this trait onto others and make their victims feel like the insecure ones. This type of envy, while common among narcissists, isnt just limited to malignant narcissists.
You have to make a narcissist aware that you are on to their game. This is so they'll stop targeting you. Maintain your calm and state what is true to counter their lies. It's also important to keep records of every interaction you have with the narcissist.
Empaths tend to desire validation and love from a narcissist, potentially due to their childhood experience of not having their emotional needs met by a caregiver or parent. Likely, an empath had a narcissistic parent, or experienced some kind of emotional neglect in which they learned that love is conditional.
Narcissists are frightened, fragile people.
Rejection, humiliation, and even the tiniest of defeats can shake them to their core.
The most effective weapon to fend off narcissists is self-love. When you love yourself, it is more difficult for the narcissist to manipulate you and get under your skin. It will hurt them to know that you do not need them, that you are better off without them, and that you love yourself exactly as you are.
It comes hand-in-hand with this that narcissists hate being criticised or called out. Which is exactly why there's one word in particular narcissistic people cannot stand: "no".
People with narcissism tend not to like seeing other people happy. When they see you happy, the best thing you can do is to stay firm on your boundaries, focus on the present and what makes you happy, and avoid getting into arguments. They might try to hurt you to disrupt your peace and justify their actions.
It's normal to fight with your significant other, but narcissists can be incredibly cruel and threatening in heated situations. This is because they cannot see you as somebody they love, and someone who has angered them at the same time.
Breakups with narcissists don't always end the relationship. Many won't let you go, even when they are the ones who left the relationship, and even when they're with a new partner. They won't accept “no.” They hoover in an attempt to rekindle the relationship or stay friends after a breakup or divorce.
A narcissist will deliberately hurt you to make you feel weak so that they can feel superior, to regulate their emotions by projecting all of their negative one's onto you, and to bait you into an argument so that they can get more narcissistic supply.