The reasons why people have such sad thoughts can be many. It is not uncommon for them to have a false self-image or basically low self-esteem. Sometimes they have also had negative experiences with an ex-partner who kept them down and made them feel unlovable or worthless.
Someone who has made mistakes in their life might feel that they do not deserve to be loved, or that anyone who knows what they have done will not love them. A person who pushes people away or engages in self-sabotaging behavior might think that these choices mean they do not deserve love.
You are Worthy of Love (and support)
If this sounds overwhelming – do not fear. A relationship coach, therapist, or counselor can help guide you to create a new story around you being deserving of love.
It's totally normal to have times when you feel more or less in love with your partner. At the same time, it's painful to have stillnesses in a relationship that leave you feeling lost or doubting its future.
Those who believe they are unworthy of love are not being modest, stoic, or poetic; they are denying themselves a fundamental need that all humans crave. Moreover, according to research from PsychTests the belief that one is undeserving of love can have a significantly negative impact on a person's well-being.
You are never too damaged to be in a relationship or to be loved. You are deserving and worthy of love no matter what phase of life you are in. More than half the battle is remaining open to receiving love.
About a third of never-married single adults (35%) say that they have never been in a committed romantic relationship.
People lacking love therefore feel more depressed. This triggers a range of core beliefs such as worthlessness, or a negative outlook on life. Overtime, we become less motivated to complete tasks, set goals or prioritize our self-care.
People who have philophobia have a fear of love. This fear is so intense that they find it difficult, sometimes impossible, to form and maintain loving relationships. “Philos” is the Greek word for loving or beloved.
According to Dr. Joshua Klapow, Ph. D., clinical psychologist and host of The Kurre and Klapow Show, feeling unworthy of a loving relationship is much more common than you might think.
It could be past trauma, unfamiliarity with receiving, feelings of unworthiness, and much more. Regardless, it is very common to feel resistance to receiving love in compliments, affection, accepting help, and more.
There are many reasons someone may feel like they need to earn love. It may have been that you had a parent with very high expectations. Someone may have manipulated you to do something that you thought would get you love.
Worthiness and Self-Esteem
Feelings of unworthiness can stem from childhood trauma, previous rejection, or shame. Feeling unworthy, at its extreme, is a symptom of depression, a potentially life-threatening illness.
Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD, is a licensed clinical psychologist and a professor at Yeshiva University's clinical psychology doctoral program. We all want to feel close and desired by our partners, and when that doesn't happen, we may become concerned. However, feeling unwanted in a relationship is extremely common.
Arachibutyrophobia is the fear of having peanut butter stuck to the roof of your mouth. Arachibutyrophobia is a rare phobia that involves a fear of getting peanut butter stuck to the roof of your mouth.
Fear of dating and relationships, or sarmassophobia, is defined literally as a fear of love play. It "presents" as a fear of social situations, objects, and people who engage in behavior typical of romantic interactions. That includes flirting, kissing, and, yes, dating.
Gynophobia is a fear — or phobia — of women. People with this condition often experience fear or anxiety that can interfere with daily life. And despite common myth, gynophobia is not simply misogyny but a real phobia.
It might not be anything that you're doing or not doing. It could also be that you struggle to love someone because of your own experiences. Some people don't deserve love from you, such as if they're abusive towards you. If they've broken your trust or caused you emotional pain or trauma, it can be hard to love them.
It might feel like having noticeably less interest in your partner and feeling less excited about spending time with them, even though you still care about them.
Lack of self-love, self-esteem, and self-worth manifests as scarcity in finances, lack of trust in relationships, an unfulfilling career and job, and a sense of missing control of our own life. Abundance, harmony, and fullness of life start from the inside.
Other more recent research suggests that the overall percentage could be far higher than 11%. A 2014 Pew Report estimated that by the time today's young adults reach the age of about 50, about 25% will have been single all their lives.
And, according to the findings, the average age you'll find your partner varies from gender to gender. That's right - the research found that the average woman finds their life partner at the age of 25, while for men, they're more likely to find their soulmate at 28.
According to Match.com's findings, women are more likely to meet that special someone earlier in life at age 25, whereas men meet their match closer to 28.