INFJs are a fierce personality type defined by their idealism, achievement, perfectionism, and sensitivity. These introverts are hopeless romantics who tend to fall in love easily, but they also struggle to make the first move, flirt and show love once they're in a relationship.
Relationships can be overwhelming for the sensitive INFJ. After all, we tune into other people's emotions and sometimes struggle to sort our complex feelings out. Yet, as intense as INFJ relationships can be, these personalities usually seek long-term commitment from a partner, not a casual fling.
INFJs should also take time with the process. INFJs tend to fall hard and fast in love and have incredibly high expectations. They also have difficulty finding people that are right for them because they are introverts and don't strive to meet new people or socialize.
Commitment and Marriage
Those with INFJ traits do well in committed relationships and marriage, although they may have a hard time finding a partner who can give them the deep, emotional connection that they crave.
As sensitive personalities, INFJs feel attracted to people who show kindness towards others. Extraverted Feeling is their auxiliary function, which means INFJs try to connect in a gentle way, and appreciate those who can do the same.
INFJs are most likely to marry someone who shares their values and vision for the future, regardless of their personality type. INFJs are more likely to marry someone who values emotional depth and intimacy and is dedicated to personal growth and development.
When I surveyed INFJs about their flirting styles, more than anything, they expressed a deep desire to connect emotionally with someone they liked. They will be more emotionally open, express more of their deeper longings, and become more vulnerable with you if they like you.
True vulnerability may be challenging at first, so INFJs need partners who can be patient until trust is built in the relationship. The feelings of those closest to them, including romantic partners, are like an open book to INFJs and they tend to assume that others can see into their hearts just as easily.
INTP (“The Logician”)
In the world of personality theory, the INTP and INFJ pairing has been nicknamed “The Golden Pair” because these two types can be highly compatible. Personally, I have only known one INTP (that I'm aware of). This person played a significant role in my life.
INFJs look for a long term relationship, most INFJs don't do one night stands or short term relationships. The dating scene now, is more or less for appearance sake which isn't genuine to the INFJ. So the INFJ might wait for a serious relationship while their friends jump into relationships around them.
High expectations, INFJs are very critical people, not only on themselves. So the INFJ might want to find someone that meets those criteria or will be selective on their chosen partners. This obviously will take time to find a good partner to their standard.
Don't ever pressure an INFJ to engage in social interactions. Introverts often struggle to be understood, since far too many extroverts don't understand what it's like to want alone time. If you're dating an INFJ, don't pressure them to spend more time with friends or increase their social circle.
INFJ: Try not to overthink it
It also doesn't do the INFJ any service when they ask their dates to elaborate on small comments or actions that meant nothing. Instead, you should listen to your strong iNtuitive nature and avoid involving your date in your overthinking process unless there's a good reason for it.
INFJs are soul-filled lovers.
For INFJs, sex is an expression of love rather than lust, and they will rarely engage in it casually. They view sex as a communion of the souls, adding to the bond between them and their mate. INFJs are passionate partners, and see sexual intimacy as a way to make their partners happy.
INFJ: Superficiality
Superficial conversations about gossipy topics or small talk don't usually interest an INFJ, so it can be a major turn-off when someone is too eager to stick to the surface level of communication. Shallow conversations and frivolous topics can make an INFJ feel bored, disconnected, and uninspired.
INFJs are easily rattled, anxious and stressed when they have too much to do in a short space of time, when they aren't given time to reflect on problems or when someone is watching them.
Advocate (INFJ) Weaknesses. Sensitive to Criticism – Advocates aren't averse to feedback – that is, unless they believe that someone is challenging their most cherished principles or values. When it comes to the issues that are near and dear to them, people with this personality type can become defensive or dismissive.
Technically it is supposed to be an ENTP or ENFP. I would also consider INFP having seen the two interact. Since INFJ has introverted intuition as their dominant function they are most compatible with other intuitives: NT and NF. Idealists were 73% satisfied with Idealists (NF).
You attract an INFJ by listening to them; without trying to come up with solutions. Although advice can be very helpful at times, sometimes, listening intently really helps more. LIstening helps validate the emotions of people and show how attentive and aware you are. But also that you're present.
At their best, INFJs make modest, reliable teammates, and allow others to take the lead. INFJs may undervalue their own needs, ideas, and contributions, acting overly shy and not taking credit when due. At their worst, INFJs can be excessively submissive, ineffectual, and too dependent on direction from others.
Because of our passionate need for meaningful connection, we INFJs can get jealous easily when we see other people connecting and having fun. We might compare ourselves to them, or worse yet, when someone close to us has friends of their own, we might pull away, feeling unwanted and pathetic.
To the INFJ, flirting with someone they truly like is often much more subtle. This is when the INFJ starts wanting to dive into deep and intimate conversations. They will ask the object of their affection about their inner thoughts and feelings, wanting to really dig deep. They don't want to flirt in a shallow way.