Sometimes the stakes are high and lies are necessary to safeguard someone's well-being. In these types of situations, lying for the sake of protecting yourself or loved ones is deemed acceptable: Lying to an abuser to escape from or protect someone from domestic abuse.
If you have someone's best interests at heart
But “prosocial” lies—fibs intended to benefit others—can actually build trust between people, according to research. “People's primary interest, at least when they receive information and build trust is in benevolence,” says Emma E.
If you're lying to protect someone's feelings—also called a white lie—then some people say that's OK. “Your reason for telling a white lie has to be positive,” says Robert Feldman, a professor who studies lying. “It should make the other person feel good about themselves.”
Some people who lie often do so with good intentions. We call these "white lies", or lies that occur when the person wants to avoid causing someone else pain. A husband may lie to spare his wife's feelings, or a father may lie to avoid his child's tears.
Actually use the words “I'm sorry” or “I apologize.” Name or specify the infraction you're apologizing for. Show you understand why your actions were harmful and hurtful, and the effect it had on the other person. Don't make excuses, but offer an explanation if needed.
The study authors found that those who consider themselves good liars used a mix of four verbal tactics: “keeping the statement clear and simple,” “telling a plausible story,” “using avoidance/being vague about details,” and “embedding the lie into an otherwise truthful story.” Essentially, the best liars tell clear, ...
We might lie to protect a persecuted individual from harm – or, less dramatically, to avoid hurting the feelings of someone close to us. It may have been with good intentions like these in mind that most of our readers agreed with our statement. Of course, not all the lies that we justify telling have such noble aims.
SWEET LIE (swēt ˈlī) : A white lie told during courting, to make oneself appear 'sweeter' than they actually are.
Pathological chronic lying
Narcissists can be very cunning, sly, and resourceful in inventing lies. They are manipulative, deceitful, and unscrupulous to alienate their victims and influence observers. They start by lying about themselves, then move on to lying about their ex, their career, and their accomplishments.
The conventional wisdom about white lies is that they are mostly okay, depending on the situation. It's commonly agreed that lying is fine in these situations to: Avoid hurting someone's feelings. Boost someone's self-esteem.
Emotions May Get Hurt
They will & they should! If a family member or friend hurts you, you should correct them by telling the truth. It will be beneficial for them and even your relationship in the long run. So, don't be scared of hurting emotions and say it as it is but in a humble tone.
Instead, liars offer various responses such as “I'm an honest person,” “You don't have to believe me if you don't want to,” or “I have no reason to lie.” The question “Why should I believe you?” can be asked in a variety of ways depending on the sensitivity of the relationship.
One of the seven deadly sins God hates is a lying tongue (Proverbs 6:16-17). Here is why God hates lying. A person who lies hates the individual they are lying to (Proverbs 26:28).
Lying is like the denial, but more active and intentional. Whereas denial is a flat out “nope, not me” in response to accusations, lying includes more data and more engagement. Lying can include adding information (a tactic used in many lies, by the way), or leaving out important information.
Sometimes the stakes are high and lies are necessary to safeguard someone's well-being. In these types of situations, lying for the sake of protecting yourself or loved ones is deemed acceptable: Lying to an abuser to escape from or protect someone from domestic abuse.
If they feel that someone closes in on their lies and raises questions, liars tend to get angry and defensive. Even if no one is outright accusing them, they have an overblown reaction due to their fear of being caught. It also acts as a distraction and helps take the spotlight off their lies.
Sometimes the lie at hand might be so minor that confronting the person about it might not be in your best interest. Consider the lie fully and determine where it ranks in severity. The decision to confront the person should ultimately rely on the type of lie and the relationship with the liar, according to LIVESTRONG.
A narcissistic liar is a person who lies to get what they want. They are often charming and persuasive. But their primary goal is always self-promotion. They want to present themselves in a certain light and believe they can get away with it.
Playful comments that acknowledge the lie will usually do the trick. Whether it's “Hey, I think I just saw your nose grow a little bit” or “I need to get my prescription checked. When I looked at the scorecard, it said you shot 112,” this strategy gives the liar a chance to admit their slip-up without fear of reprisal.