Being in a committed relationship with someone who is dealing with anxiety isn't easy. Your partner's anxiety may bring up intense emotions, either from your past or about your current relationship. This is completely normal but may lead to unfavorable reactions toward your partner.
With patience, empathy, and open communication, dating someone with anxiety can be a fulfilling and loving experience. Remember to educate yourself about anxiety, offer support and encouragement, and avoid dismissiveness, criticism, and avoidance.
Someone with anxiety can react to relationship stress with a fight-or-flight response as if the stress were a physical attack. Sometimes anxious thoughts motivate your partner to act in ways that stress you out and strain the relationship.
Anxiety Disorders and Co-Dependency in Relationships
Many individuals with anxiety disorders have an intense desire for closeness to their romantic partners depending on them regularly for support and reassurance, which often leads to overdependence and co-dependent behaviors.
Being with someone who has an anxiety disorder can be hard to understand because it can be hard to empathise with them when you aren't feeling anxious yourself. You also can't solve a lot of problems that cause anxiety logically as a lot of what the person is struggling with comes from how they are feeling.
Relationship anxiety doesn't necessarily mean that you're in an unhealthy relationship or your partner is a walking red flag. “Often it's caused by our own insecurities and past experiences,” says Klesman.
Dating someone with anxiety can feel very overwhelming and stressful, especially once your partner's behavior shifts. They may start to shut down, pull away, and behave in a passive-aggressive manner, or they may become more controlling, angry, or overly critical.
Some people with relationship anxiety go even further than looking for reasons to break up, and actually sabotage the relationship. This stems from a fear that “things won't work out anyway.” If this is the case, reflect on what is motivating you to do so.
Many people find that having an untreated anxiety disorder can affect their romantic life. People with a social anxiety disorder may constantly worry about how they are being judged by others, so they may avoid romantic relationships or dating in general due to the fear of embarrassment.
Research has demonstrated that a heightened level of anxiety in the moment may cause someone to feel more attracted to a potential partner than they would have otherwise.
Provide some Reassurance and Attention
Generally, anxiously attached adults need reassurance that they are loved and worthy. One way to ensure they feel loved is to tell them you love them. Without the cost of feeding into their constant need for reassurance, they need to hear it every once in a while.
Mental illness alone is no excuse to break up with someone. Loads of people with mental health conditions are able to enjoy long lasting, fulfilling, happy relationships. Just because someone is depressed, has anxiety, or [insert mental illness here], doesn't mean you should write them off.
Some of the neurochemicals include the hormone oxytocin, which plays an important role in social bonding, slows down heart rate, and reduces stress and anxiety levels. The release of endorphins in the brain's reward pathways supports the immediate feelings of pleasure and well-being derived from a hug or caress.
Love can feel a whole lot like anxiety.
"Not being able to eat, being preoccupied, being unsettled, nervy, jumpy, ungrounded, those can be symptoms of anxiety, but they can also be symptoms of excitement," says Sally Baker, senior therapist at Working on the Body.
It can come about in thoughts, feelings, and actions and affect many parts of a person's life—including their sex life. Anxious feelings can keep you from talking with your partner about your desires or prevent you from being confident about your body during sex.
Having trust issues as a singular issue isn't a mental illness. However, it can be indicative of an actual mental health condition, particularly: Anxiety disorders, especially PTSD. Borderline personality disorder (BPD)
Don't let anxiety cause selfishness
One of the biggest problems with anxiety is that it can cause a person to become pretty self-absorbed or even selfish. They can understandably get wrapped up in their own fears, worries, and stress and tend to forget about everything else and everyone else around them.
A marriage complicated by anxiety creates a stressful environment for both spouses. The anxious half may suffer from limiting feelings and inability to face the daily demands of life, while the non-anxious spouse assumes more than the normal share of domestic, parenting, financial, and other responsibilities.
Saying something like “My girlfriend has mental health issues” is no valid reason for them to leave their partner. Your mental health issue is also an invalid reason to leave your relationship either. In fact, if your partner is supportive, they'll help to keep yourself balanced.
1. Overly controlling behavior. Overly controlling behavior is a common red flag in relationships. People that try to control your movements, decisions, or beliefs are more concerned about what they want than what is best for you.
One of the biggest red flags in a relationship you must watch out for is persistent or constant criticism. In a healthy relationship, two people want the best for each other. They are honest about their strengths and flaws and help each other out to be the best version of themselves.
Lifestyle changes, such as spending time with supportive friends and family, regular exercise, getting enough sleep, maintaining a healthy diet and cutting down on alcohol and other drugs are all worthwhile changes that can help to reduce anxiety and depression symptoms.
Research shows that people who have an anxious attachment style may bemore likely to engage in manipulative behavior.