Avoid having the same argument repeatedly. If someone will not accept responsibility, change your approach, or table the issue. Continuing to push them to take responsibility or apologize will only make them more defensive. Instead, see if you can agree on solutions.
Increase communication and express your concerns. To begin handling an irresponsible husband who does not support the wife, it is important to increase communication and express your concerns. This involves being honest about your feelings and explaining how his behavior is affecting your life together.
Your husband does not like to be confronted with the truth and uses tactics to prevent himself from having to face it because he is not able to accept feedback. Perhaps he was raised by a controlling parent or by parents who gave him so much freedom that he questioned whether they even cared.
Together, discuss your financial situation, goals, and challenges. Look at your household bills and financial responsibilities, and figure out how you'll tackle them together. If you can't get on the same side, it may be time to seek professional support to help you reach a middle ground.
Get professional help when necessary
“If you think your partner is financially irresponsible and you are having a hard time communicating about it, I suggest engaging a third party.” Above all, if you have serious concerns about the other person's financial situation, it's smart to be careful about marrying them.
If your partner crosses a boundary, like yelling at you, or going through your phone without permission, or —worst case scenario—get violent, and say things like: “I wouldn't have to do that if you weren't stupid,” it's not just avoiding accountability, they're also punishing you for something you didn't do.
Irresponsible - Definition, Meaning & Synonyms | Vocabulary.com.
They are looking to wear out the other spouse, until they finally give up and walk away from the relationship entirely. It causes many who employ this strategy to feel guilty for putting the other through that, instead of being honest about wanting out of the marriage.
In a marriage emotional neglect is when a spouse CONSISTENTLY fails to notice, attend to, and respond IN A TIMELY MANNER to a spouse's feelings. This has far-reaching negative consequences for the relationship.
9 reasons your partner or spouse blames you for everything.
They're insecure, have low self-esteem and admitting to being wrong is too scary for them. They want to defend themselves. It's a learned (unhealthy) relationship skill – their parents blamed them for everything (toxic family?), so that's what they do.
Stonewalling is when a person in a relationship withdraws from an interaction, shuts down, and simply stops responding to their partner. Rather than confronting the issue, people who stonewall resort to evasive maneuvers.
A hallmark of borderline personality disorder is not being able to take any accountability or responsibility for emotions. The person with borderline has such a complicated relationship with themselves and their own thoughts that they don't want to take responsibility for them.
Deflecting typically appears in conflictual situations, when a person is confronted with their mistakes. Instead of accepting responsibility and facing the uncomfortable situation head-on, the deflector will try to move the focus from themselves, usually by passing the blame onto someone or something else.
Lack of accountability is a pet peeve for sure, and also a common problem with narcissists. Although there are many disturbing factors in the personality of a narcissist, this one is tough to deal with in any relationship.
Being accountable to one another is not about policing or parenting each other but promoting a healthy oneness with your spouse. A lack of accountability and boundaries in marriage has the potential for great harm such as divorce or infidelity.
Narcissists lack accountability in their actions and use blame-shifting to get the focus off themselves. Through the blame-shifting, they never learn how to take accountability, and this maintains the unhealthy way of responding to conflicts and disagreements.
Missing bill payments or not paying them in full is the No. 1 financial red flag identified by the survey. “Developing the habit of paying your full balance by the deadline will serve you well in the long run and prevent accruing late fees,” Hines Droesch said.
No, many people find that money issues are a deal breaker.
It's okay if a guy's money problems give you pause. If he's not financially stable and he shows no signs of changing his habits, take that into account when you're deciding whether or not to pursue a serious relationship with him.
If both partners are giving equally, the relationship will work. But if your partner takes you for granted or doesn't respect you, that means trouble. Sometimes this is a result of relationship stressors that can be fixed. If you feel deeply that your partner no longer values you, it could be time to leave.