When people like someone, their eyes often show attraction through dilated pupils, increased eye contact (sometimes lingering), a softer or brighter gaze, and potentially a slightly increased blink rate, all subconscious signals of interest, pleasure, and arousal controlled by the brain's autonomic nervous system. They might gaze longer at the face (for love) or body (for lust), and the look feels warm and open.
Your pupils naturally expand in dim light and shrink in bright light. But they also dilate in response to strong emotions like attraction and love. Research from the University of Chicago found that if a person is looking at someone they desire, their pupils will dilate without them even realising.
Two people in love, love shown towards a family member, child, or even a pet all cause the same response: the pupil (the black part in the center of the eye) dilates. The size of the pupil can be an indication of emotional responses and messages.
When someone really likes you, and they look at you, their eyes will be steady and unwavering. They like you, and they know that their feelings won't change, so they'll look at you confidently, instead of being hesitant or avoiding your gaze.
When we're face to face with someone who sets our pulse racing, there's no hiding the attraction. From dilated pupils to fluttering eyelashes to raised eyebrows, the signs are visible if you pay attention.
Eye contact
With eye contact, there's a three second rule. If you hold someone's gaze for longer than three seconds, you enter a situation known as "kiss or kill". Longer eye contact signals one of two things - either you are attracted to the person or you want to attack them.
Signs of attraction include prolonged eye contact, frequent glances, and dilated pupils. Someone who is attracted to you might also playfully or shyly look away and then glance back.
The 2-2-2 rule in love is a relationship guideline to keep connections strong by scheduling regular, dedicated time together: a date night every two weeks, a weekend getaway every two months, and a week-long vacation every two years, helping couples prioritize each other and break daily routines to maintain intimacy and fun.
In a study conducted by psychologist Zick Rubin, he introduced the concept of the "love gaze," wherein couples deeply in love maintained eye contact for a more extended period than those who were less emotionally connected.
Prolonged eye contact has been thought to release phenylethylamine, a chemical responsible for feelings of attraction. It has also been thought to release oxytocin, the love chemical most closely associated with longer term bonding and commitment.
Pupil Dilation: As mentioned earlier, pupil dilation is associated with positive emotions, making your eyes appear larger and more inviting. This subtle yet powerful cue is often a sign of attraction and affection.
The "seductive eye trick," often called the Triangle Method, involves a subtle shift of gaze between one eye, then the lips, and finally the other eye, creating a visual triangle to signal romantic or sexual interest without words. This technique builds intimacy and chemistry by suggesting desire and focus, making the other person feel seen and captivating them in a playful, non-verbal way, according to relationship experts and viral social media trends.
While it's challenging to definitively say that love can be seen in the eyes, certain cues can indicate attraction or affection: Prolonged eye contact. Dilated pupils. Softened gaze.
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A guy might be sexually attracted to you if he makes flirty eye contact with you and can't stop smiling around you. He might also like you if he touches you often and makes an effort to lean in close to you. A man is probably sexually attracted to you if you catch him staring at you or scanning your body up and down.
The 777 dating rule is a relationship strategy for intentional connection, suggesting couples schedule a date every 7 days, an overnight getaway every 7 weeks, and a longer vacation every 7 months to keep the spark alive, build memories, and prevent disconnection from daily life. It's about consistent, quality time, not necessarily grand gestures, and focuses on undivided attention to strengthen intimacy and partnership over time.
If you want to change the ways others treat you, you should first change the way you treat yourself, fully and sincerely, there is no way you can be loved. Once you achieve that stage, however, be thankful for every thorn that others might throw at you. It is a sign that you will soon be showered in roses.
But it does provide some rough guidelines as to how soon may be too soon to make long-term commitments and how long may be too long to stick with a relationship. Each of the three numbers—three, six, and nine—stands for the month that a different common stage of a relationship tends to end.
The strongest indicator of attraction is often considered sustained, meaningful eye contact, especially when combined with other cues like leaning in or pupil dilation, as it signals interest and intimacy, but the most reliable confirmation is always direct communication like verbal consent or expressing interest. Other key indicators include positive body language (leaning in, mirroring), increased physical closeness, frequent smiling, and a strong desire to learn about the other person, with biological factors like scent also playing a role.
Leadingham also suggests an eye contact method called “The Gaze:” “This is where you maintain eye contact for just two to three seconds longer than a typical casual glance, which is usually one to two seconds,” she says. “Then you look back again for two to three seconds.
"Some signs might be similar to what you experience in real life, such as easy flowing conversation, a desire to spend time with one another, being intellectually stimulated by them, and feeling excitement about the next interaction with them," she says.
Statistically, crushes often last a few months.
Most of the time, the feelings just…go away, but on rare occasions, a crush is returned and develops into a relationship. Some crushes have been known to last more than a year—but usually, they fade after you get to know the person a little better.
9 Signs of Unspoken Mutual Attraction Between Two People