In general, the etiquette for funeral attire is the same for both men and women: business-type attire that is respectful and conservative. Err on the side of dressing up as opposed to dressing down. Black or another dark color is almost always appropriate.
No Suit, No Problem
Funerals are a stressful life event and not knowing what to wear only adds to this anxiety. Etiquette says that men should wear a black or dark colored suit to a funeral. However, this isn't always possible and that's okay. Not owning traditional funeral attire is no reason to skip a funeral.
"Talking or being on your phone during the service is one of the most disrespectful things you could do at a funeral," says Myka Meier, Beaumont Etiquette founder and etiquette expert. It's important to be as present as possible. "Silence your phone, shut off your phone, or even just leave it behind.
Funerals are a way for friends and family to say their goodbyes, reminisce, or grieve, and ultimately find closure. Choosing whether to attend is at the discretion of each individual, family member. Whatever you choose, know that it isn't disrespectful to not go to a funeral for personal reasons.
Wearing proper attire can show respect and care for the deceased, their family, and others. In general, an outfit to wear to a funeral should be more on the conservative side, something you might wear to a business meeting, a job interview, or church or synagogue.
Dark or muted dresses are traditional and don't take attention away from the service. Shoulders should be covered in most cases. Skirts and dresses should reach the knee. Suits are also considered respectful and appropriate.
Traditionally, funeral etiquette suggests men and women wear black clothing that's conservative and respectful. Black or dark colours are most common, but some cultures expect mourners to wear a less traditional funeral colour.
It is not a selfish act to request not to have a funeral after you pass away. There are many reasons why you may not want to have a funeral and any of them are valid. You deserve to have any send-off that you wish for, so don't be afraid to share your last wishes with your family openly and honestly.
Funerals may be faith based or a celebration of life. They will usually include a eulogy and often pictures, music, or readings are included. Attending either a funeral or visitation shows respect for human life and affection for those who have lost someone they love.
Avoid dressing in casual clothing, such as athletic wear, tank tops, or shorts. Skip the flip-flops, tennis shoes, sneakers, or boat shoes. Remove the neon necktie, purse, or accessory. Shy away from wearing jeans, even black ones, because they are considered too casual for a funeral.
Wearing dark grey or deep blue is just as appropriate as black, while brown and lighter greys are suitable for the vast majority of funeral services. However, unless specifically requested by the deceased or their family, you should avoid any bright colors such as yellows, oranges, pinks, and reds.
Attending a visitation can be the hardest part for people to attend, because it involves talking to the deceased's family. A good recommendation is to say something simple such as “I am sorry about your loss”, especially if there are many other guests waiting to share their condolences.
If you have an adult with you at the funeral home, it is ok to touch a dead body, and you will not get in trouble. You are naturally curious, and sometimes when you see and touch a dead body it helps you answer your questions. Remember to be gentle and have an adult help you.
If you don't have a suit, you could pair dark trousers or smart jeans with a long-sleeved shirt, black tie, and a smart black coat. If you don't have any of these things, that's ok, wear anything that you feel comfortable in. The most important thing is that you're there.
Wearing a dress that goes to your knees or below is a safe bet. A nice shirt and skirt in dark colors. Shirts that aren't low-cut and that also have some sort of sleeve are usually considered appropriate for funerals. Longer skirts are also more common, usually to the knee or longer.
It is customary to show your respects by viewing the deceased if the body is present and the casket is open. You may wish to say a silent prayer for, or meditate about, the deceased at this time. In some cases the family may escort you to the casket. The length of your visit at the wake is a matter of discretion.
For this is what the LORD says: "Do not enter a house where there is a funeral meal; do not go to mourn or show sympathy, because I have withdrawn my blessing, my love and my pity from this people," declares the LORD.
Not say or do anything at all
Sometimes when you don't know what to say, you might feel the urge to avoid or ignore the bereaved. While they may not notice in their grievous state, if you are an important person in their life, they most likely will eventually take note.
Traditional funerals are the most common type of funeral in Australia. They have three main components: the viewing or visitation, the funeral service, and the burial ceremony. They often feature the casket or coffin at the front of the service. Direct burial is one of the most cost-effective types of funerals.
First and foremost, dress appropriately. This means no jeans, shorts, or tank tops. Instead, opt for dark, conservative clothing. Women should avoid wearing anything too revealing or flashy, and men should make sure their clothing is clean and wrinkle-free.
Can you wear jeans to a funeral? The most common answer is that jeans aren't considered appropriate funeral etiquette unless requested by the family. However, dark, unembellished jeans paired with a shirt, tie, and blazer for men or a blouse and a blazer for women can be appropriate for a casual service.
Advantages of open-casket funerals
Allows friends and family members to kiss the deceased goodbye one last time. The family can hold the decedent's hand. Everyone can take comfort in seeing the deceased looking beautiful and at peace.
Tears are normal and expected at a funeral; however, if you find yourself crying uncontrollably, in a manner that would be upsetting to others or call undue attention to yourself, it is best to excuse yourself from the service until you can gain control.
Benefits of Open Casket
Allows friends and family members to kiss the deceased goodbye one last time. Everyone can take comfort in seeing the deceased looking beautiful and at peace.