“Making eye contact and holding it just a few seconds longer than a casual glance causes him to take notice of you and start to wonder what you may have meant by that,” says Lieberman. “It's the cool 'silent flirt' that can make him want to know more.”
Without even realizing it, you may be sending physical signals such as protruding your chest (whether male or female) but if you're a woman, you'll flash the flirtatious gaze especially once the interaction gets going.
Smiling. Orienting your body toward the person you are flirting with (hips and feet facing them) Mirroring their movements. Catching their eye, averting your gaze, and then looking back again.
In his book he examines five key styles: polite, playful, sincere, and traditional. Take the quiz here to see which one you are. There is no right or wrong way to flirt, but according to author Jeffrey Hall there are five different styles.
This can mean buying a drink in a social setting, freely giving compliments, side arm hugs or other non-sexual touches, a platonic friendship. The term “harmless” is only applicable if you are willing to disclose this behavior (without shame or concern) to your partner.
Giving compliments, using suggestive body language, maintaining eye contact, and perking up when you are around this person are all subtle signs of flirting.
Innocent flirting is a lighthearted and playful form of social interaction that involves casual, friendly banter, compliments, and teasing without any serious intent or expectation to pursue a romantic or sexual relationship.
Beyond showing off your pearly whites, body language goes a long way when flirting. Murray suggests “leaning towards them with your body” and “having your feet face them so you are looking at them.” It's an easy way to signal openness and let the other person know you're interested.
It's not always easy to tell if a guy is flirting, because guys can flirt by being nice to you, by ignoring you, or even by being a little bit mean to you. Just when you're sure the guy is really into you, he may suddenly give you the cold shoulder or send you mixed signals.
Clues to spot flirting are body language, such as smiling, leaning forward, and touching, and verbal cues such as compliments or references to being available. You can also ask yourself if the person's behavior is consistent over time and whether they act differently with you than they do with others.
Do your best to look friendly and open, and offer a genuine smile when you're flirting. Try to avoid fidgeting and make eye contact when you're chatting with them. Averting your eyes can come off as a bit shifty and weird. Take a moment to slowly breathe in and out if you're feeling a little on edge.
