It is customary to show your respects by viewing the deceased if the body is present and the casket is open. You may wish to say a silent prayer for, or meditate about, the deceased at this time. In some cases the family may escort you to the casket. The length of your visit at the wake is a matter of discretion.
Simply saying hello and thanking people for coming is sufficient. However, if you would like to have longer conversations with anyone in attendance that is absolutely fine, and does not mean that you then have to have long conversations with everyone.
What do I say? “The best thing: 'I am truly sorry for your loss. ' ” Also, if you can, Olson suggests mentioning something about the deceased: “I really loved your mother's garden and her beautiful flowers,” or “I loved how your dad was always washing his cars.” “Keep it simple,” he advises.
Viewing Etiquette
Just remember not to disturb other mourners standing by the casket. Try to wear formal, muted clothing for a viewing and remember to offer condolences to any family members present. You should also feel free to speak quietly with other attendees about your memories of the deceased.
The worst things to say at a funeral
Don't tell friends or family members who are grieving that their loved one has gone to a better place. Never call the death a blessing or speculate that it was that person's time. Avoid saying anything that suggests that the loss of the loved one is a positive thing.
First and foremost, dress appropriately. This means no jeans, shorts, or tank tops. Instead, opt for dark, conservative clothing. Women should avoid wearing anything too revealing or flashy, and men should make sure their clothing is clean and wrinkle-free.
: to attend a funeral as a sign of respect for the person who died.
To pay your respects, you may bow in front of the altar of the deceased. While bowing, you may offer a quiet prayer, or simply speak a few words in your heart to the deceased. This is considered to be universally acceptable behaviour, regardless of religious beliefs.
During a funeral ceremony, you typically stay silent unless invited to speak during the service. At a visitation, you usually chat with the family and other guests.
While black is always a great go-to if you're unsure about what you're wearing, colors like gray and navy are also appropriate. Your most important goal is to avoid wearing anything that will distract attention away from the loved one who has passed away.
Viewings are typically a smaller affair than funerals, and they take place before the funeral. Viewings can last for less than a day, or they can last for several days in a row. They occur after the deceased has been prepared by a mortician. A cremation urn may be present instead, if the deceased was cremated.
Listen to soothing music, read a book or magazine, work on a puzzle, or on your hobby. Doing something that distracts you from the day's stress and anxiety can be relaxing and bring comfort. Sit outside in the sun and enjoy a few minutes of peace and quiet.
People celebrate the lives of loved ones who have died through special foods, parades, festivals, and dancing. Many people visit the graves of loved ones, cleaning the gravesite and offering food and drinks their loved ones enjoyed during their life.
Although the loss of a loved one is sad, honoring the deceased and paying respects allows us to celebrate a life well lived and share the deceased's story. By sharing your favorite memories, you can make sure your loved one's memory will live on forever with everyone in attendance.
You are not required to actually view the body at a funeral viewing. Many people are a bit uncomfortable with the idea of attending a viewing, but keep in mind that funeral viewing etiquette does not require you to actually look at or spend time with the deceased if you are not comfortable doing so.
Wearing dark grey or deep blue is just as appropriate as black, while brown and lighter greys are suitable for the vast majority of funeral services. However, unless specifically requested by the deceased or their family, you should avoid any bright colors such as yellows, oranges, pinks, and reds.
We recommend wearing dark or neutral colors, because darker colors reflect the mourning atmosphere of the service or visitation. Clothing can be formal (think suits and dresses) or casual (pants or nice jeans and shirts).