Whether someone has read your iMessage is indicated by a "Read" receipt appearing beneath the message bubble [1].
When read receipts are turned on, the sender sees the word “Read” below messages they've sent to you, indicating that you've read their message. If you haven't read their message, the sender sees “Delivered.” You can turn on read receipts for everyone or for individual contacts.
iCloud exploitation
Someone can spy on your messages by: Logging into your iCloud account from another device to view message backups. Using a shared Apple ID (common in families) to receive your iMessages on their device. Using iCloud monitoring tools if they know your credentials.
Here are three major signs that someone might be monitoring your messages—and what you can do about it.
There's no way a carrier can, iMessages are end-to-end encrypted. But they can easily be seen if you left another device signed in with your AppleID, or someone else knows your AppleID, password and you don't use two-factor authentication.
Check access permissions in settings
Spyware and monitoring apps need elevated permissions to access your SMS messages. You can check whether any apps have permission to see your SMS messages by going to the Permission manager in your Android settings.
If the person who you sent a message to has their read receipts enabled, then they will automatically send a read receipt when they open the message. Some people don't have receipts enabled, and it's usually pretty easy to tell.
In a conversation, look for nonverbal cues like breaking eye contact or having their arms crossed. If you think a friend doesn't want to talk to you anymore, observe how often they communicate with you. If they constantly cancel plans or take forever to respond to your texts, they may be pulling away.
Three-finger gestures on iPhone primarily activate accessibility features like VoiceOver (for screen reading and navigation) and Zoom (magnification), allowing scrolling, zooming, and text manipulation (copy/paste/undo) with specific taps and drags, though some text actions work without VoiceOver enabled for quick editing. Common gestures include three-finger double-tap to toggle VoiceOver speech, triple-tap for the screen curtain, and pinching/spreading with three fingers for copy/paste actions, notes this YouTube video.
Here are some ways you can tell your phone is being tracked: Unusual location activity: You see unexpected location alerts, unknown devices linked to your account, or unfamiliar apps with location access. Checking your location history or app permissions can help confirm this.
Your iMessage and FaceTime conversations are encrypted end-to-end, so they can't be read while they're sent between devices.
Two other ways to check if someone blocked you: Call to see if you go directly to voicemail or if it rings. If you're not blocked, the phone should ring anywhere from three to twelve times before going to voicemail. A blocked number may ring only once and then go to voicemail.
Unfortunately, with traditional SMS and MMS text messaging, you cannot see if someone has read your message. Unlike messaging apps such as iMessage, WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, or RCS (Rich Communication Services), SMS and MMS do not support read receipts.
The "3-day rule" in texting and dating generally suggests waiting three days to contact someone after getting their number or a first date to avoid seeming too eager or desperate, but many modern daters find it outdated, preferring to text when genuinely interested to show confidence and avoid "playing games". While some still use it as a way to gauge interest or create space, others see waiting too long as a sign of disinterest, with opinions varying on whether it's helpful or an old-fashioned tactic.
The 70/30 rule in relationships suggests balancing time together (70%) with personal time apart (30%) for hobbies, friends, and self-growth, promoting independence and preventing codependency, while another view says it's about accepting 70% of your partner as "the one" and learning to live with the other 30% of quirks, requiring effort to manage major issues within that space, not a pass for abuse. Both interpretations emphasize finding a sustainable balance and acknowledging that relationships aren't always 50/50, with the key being communication and effort, not strict adherence to numbers.
Obtaining a spouse's text messages can ordinarily be done in two ways. One way might be to send a letter to the cell phone carrier, through an attorney, explaining the need to preserve text messages for a divorce case.
We designed iMessage to use end-to-end encryption, so there's no way for Apple to decrypt the content of your conversations when they are in transit between devices. Attachments you send over iMessage (such as photos or videos) are encrypted so that no one but the sender and receiver(s) can access them.
Your wife could see your text messages in a few ways. If your iCloud syncs automatically, or you have backups enabled, your messages might display on other devices that she can access. She might have installed monitoring apps on your phone, or simply be using a shared phone.
Log in to iCloud.com with your Apple ID and see which devices have access. Anything other than your current phone should be revoked, your password updated, and you should have 2FA enabled so you get a message or need to approve via another device if anyone tries to log in.