If a small, intimate day is what you want, it can be achieved without offending too many people. Be upfront and honest about your intentions from the start, and consider alternative ways of celebrating. Remember, the most important person there will be your future husband or wife, and that is all that matters!
Tell key people.
Explain why you're not inviting any non-family—whether it's because of the pandemic, a limited budget, your preference for a small wedding, your dislike of being the center of attention, or some other personal reason. A true friend will support your decision and not feel slighted.
"We've chosen to have a very intimate wedding celebration with just close family/friends. We'd love to celebrate with you at a later date though!" "We've decided to keep our wedding celebration really small - however we'd love to invite you to our anni-ception next year." "Thank you for asking about our wedding!
“Unfortunately, we are only able to accommodate children in the wedding party at our reception.” “We wish we could include all children, but are unfortunately only able to invite immediate family.” “Due to necessity rather than choice, it is children of immediate family only.
A mini wedding - commonly referred to as an intimate or small wedding - is a wedding with less than 50 people that still has all the elements of a traditional wedding, just on a smaller scale. It typically involves the ceremony, a meal, and entertainment over the course of several hours.
Add a section saying “We have reserved __ seat(s) in your honour”, and fill in this gap with the number of people you're inviting. For example, if you're inviting your cousin Mary and she's not allowed to bring a guest, you should write “1 seat”.
"While you should never feel obligated to attend a wedding you don't want to be a part of, think carefully if the reason you are using will hold up years later when you look back on it," Gottsman says. Once you decide to decline, you should ideally share the news in person, not through the mail.
In most cases, wedding announcements are sent out the month following the wedding. Whether you wish to send them out the same week or a couple of weeks after the wedding, both are considered to be within etiquette.
The Wedding Guru says: This is a strange situation. It's proper etiquette to invite the significant others of the invitee, so a spouse, fiancé, or partner should be invited. This holds true even if the significant other isn't known by the bride or the groom. This omission could have been an oversight.
If your invitation did not include a plus-one, under no circumstances should you arrive at a wedding with an uninvited guest. If the person who was originally going to attend with you is not coming, ask the couple if you can bring someone else instead.
Staying on the conservative side when attending a wedding is smart. If you're wearing a short dress, be sure that it's no shorter than an inch above your knee. It's okay for your dress to be tailored to fit you, but be sure you're dress is not too tight.
You'll have more venue options in the planning process, a smaller guest list, and a stronger budget. It also makes the transition from ceremony to reception more seamless with fewer people. An intimate wedding can create a more laid-back environment for brides so that they can be more present on their big day.
Typically a very small wedding of less than 20 guests is called a micro wedding, while a small wedding is considered as having between 30 and 60 guests. However, it's really up to each couple what they consider “small”.
Married, Engaged, and Cohabitating Guests Traditionally Receive a Plus-One. As a rule of thumb, Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette says spouses, fiancés, and live-in partners of each guest should receive an invitation.
Here's the key to limiting your guest count:
Simply add the text “We have reserved __ seats in your honor,” then print 1 RSVP card per party, and write the number of guests allowed for that party in the blank space (by hand).
Does everyone get a plus-one to a wedding? It depends. If you have an unlimited budget and your wedding venue has ample space, you could offer every unattached guest a plus-one. However, for most couples, budget and space are limited, so giving every guest a plus-one is just not an option.
Consider saying something like, “I know you've got a lot of important work on your agenda, and I'd like to keep you off of this upcoming project so that you can focus on what you've already got. What do you think?” Or “I noticed that a couple of deadlines have slipped recently and that's pretty unusual for you.
Don't Offer a Plus 1
Let everyone know that only a specific number of guests are allowed to attend the wedding. Explain that the guest list is limited to the number of people the venue can accommodate. Unfortunately, no extra wedding guests will be able to attend.
Disadvantages of Small Weddings
Since the task of creating a smaller guest list can be very stressful, conflicts can arise between the bride and groom, each of whom may have small or large families or circles of friends they're having trouble whittling down.
Probably most people are aware of the most common advantages of having a small wedding, namely saving money and cutting down on stress. With current world events, it's clear that intimate weddings are a trend that will likely continue for quite a while to come.
A simple wedding ceremony can help you save money and open up some opportunities when it comes to your actual wedding day and even your honeymoon. If you're having a wedding during the COVID era, then you may seriously want to consider keeping the ceremony small, at least for this year.