You feel like having a girlfriend will help you feel better about yourself. In a way, you're looking for validation. You just want someone to love you. This is one of the most common reasons people want to enter relationships – to feel good about themselves.
In many ways, this is an understandable response. We feel alone, insecure or vulnerable, and being with others feel makes us less so. This urge towards relatedness fulfills not just our need for protection and security but also for purpose and direction in life.
Without feeling like you need a partner to fill a void, you'll be able to respond to dating without a sense of desperation. Enrich your life with experiences rather than just partnership. Take up a new hobby, join a meet-up group, or learn a new sport to enrich your life. Work to feel whole as yourself.
The need for affection solidifies our desire to know we are compatible with another human being, even if the relationship is on the friendship or familial level. It creates a sense of harmony in a relationship, especially when it is an intimate one, according to about.com.
Clinginess is usually a result of your own need for certainty or validation. Unfortunately, insecure clinginess can result in a toxic cycle of neediness. You may feel afraid of judgment, so you reach out for more support and validation from your friends.
You Date Down
Maybe, out of desperation, you settle for someone who doesn't make you feel all the things you are capable of feeling. Or, maybe you don't express your needs as you should because you are afraid of being perceived as “difficult” or “challenging” to a new, potential love interest.
Whatever the cause, there are some clear signs of clingy behavior, including: Not giving your partner space or alone time, especially if they have specifically requested it. Calling or texting your SO nonstop when you're not together. Panicking if your partner does not respond to your texts or calls.
Talking can help
Remember, talking can really help – choose someone you can share your feelings with, someone you trust. This might be a good friend, a relative or a work mate. Try and choose someone that you feel could help you and will offer you time and understanding.
One of the best tips to stop being needy and desperate is to keep your emotions in check around people. This doesn't mean that you need to be cold and not express your thoughts or feelings to people. What it does mean, however, is to control your emotions – whether they're positive or negative.
We have listed out several reasons behind a man being needy for affection: Rational/irrational jealousy of your other male friends, acquaintances, and colleagues. Not having a life or social circle of his own which makes his world revolve around you. Codependency or other kinds of insecure attachment styles.
Desperation is the feeling that a situation is so bad that no matter what you do, it will never get better. Depression is an expert at making us feel like we are in such bad shape that we can't be fixed.
First of all, many clingy guys become the way they are because of their childhood and background. Guys who grow up without much love, or without the right example of what love really is, tend to be more clingy. Since they were deprived of affection in childhood, they unintentionally become clingy in their dating life.
Some people become needy as adults when their physical or emotional needs are not met as children. Fear can often induce neediness, and otherwise independent people may become needy when faced with a stressful situation or life-threatening illness. Neediness is somewhat relative.
The causes of clinginess described above (low self-esteem, fear of abandonment, lack of boundaries, emotional dependence) are also some key features of the anxious attachment style. A child who constantly has to monitor the availability of an inconsistent caregiver is prevented from safely exploring the world.
“Clinginess can be a red flag in a relationship, especially if it is persistent and makes the other person feel suffocated or overwhelmed,” Dr.
All of us have an intense desire to be loved and nurtured. The need to be loved, as experiments by Bowlby and others have shown, could be considered one of our most basic and fundamental needs.
The answer is elaborate. When a woman lacks intimacy in marriage, it can have a significant impact on her emotional and physical health. The lack of physical touch, emotional connection, and sexual intimacy can lead to feelings of loneliness, depression, and low self-esteem.
You feel like a complete individual
Love happens between two whole people, which is why Carroll refers to it as "wholehearted love." Both people are free to be their whole selves. Couples experience "true individuation and self-discovery" when they're truly in love, explains Carroll.