Grief, brain changes, behaviors down the road, and mental health conditions such as anxiety, chronic stress, and depression can result. Some families have been able to move past infidelity with time and therapy. To move on, this takes active work on both partners to work on the root cause of the infidelity.
While its effects only tend to last about a week to a few months, during this period, a person can experience flashbacks similar to those experienced among people with PTSD. You may replay the sequence of events that led up to you finding out about your partner's infidelity.
Research shows that betrayed partners, after learning that their significant other has strayed, typically experience stress, anxiety, and depressive symptoms characteristic of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
It's absolutely possible to heal from infidelity. Although the pain and grief can be intense, it's also possible to work on the relationship so that you and your partner are able to move on.
Infidelity does not mean that the love is gone or never existed. The reality is that you can love someone and still cheat on them. In fact, many affairs happen in relationships that are otherwise very happy.
Unfortunately, there are several long-term effects of infidelity that can affect a person long after the cheating has stopped. These can be life-changing, and lead to the development of certain mental health conditions including chronic depression, anxiety, post-infidelity stress disorder, and betrayal trauma.
How does a woman feel after cheating? A woman goes through a whole range of emotions – anger, shame, anxiety, embarrassment, regret – after having cheated in a relationship. If she feels remorse for the pain she has caused to her partner, she starts to blame herself and finds it difficult to fix the situation.
The most important thing to remember is what cheating says about a person. They're insecure, impulsive, selfish, and immature. Sometimes, it's a chronic problem that likely won't ever be fixed, just be sure not to ignore the warning signs.
Usually, they do so for one or more of the following reasons: Self-Exploration. For some, cheating is a way to explore repressed parts of the self. These cheaters don't actually want to change the core of who they are; they just want to escape the constraints of that for a little while.
Dr. Carnes writes that in many cases of PTSD, infidelity causes new, distorted bonds to form between spouses. He calls these “trauma bonds” or “betrayal bonds.” Trauma bonds look different in every relationship.
Among men, 68% feel guilty after having an affair. Even if they haven't confessed the affair, most cheating husbands will feel guilty and express that guilt in their behavior. You may notice subtle changes in their behavior that make you wonder if your spouse is displaying cheating husband guilt.
Experts say it's possible for couples to go on to have a happy relationship after infidelity, provided they're willing to put in the work. “The couple can survive and grow after an affair,” says Coleman. “They have to—otherwise the relationship will never be gratifying.”
Statistics show that only 31% of marriages last after the affair has been discovered or admitted to. People who are unfaithful to their partners regret causing their loved one so much pain and heartache. Even if the couple decides to stay together, it's very hard for them to have a trust-based, happy relationship.
The person who was cheated (sexually or emotionally) on may meet the criteria for PTSD and experience trauma-related symptoms such as rage, humiliation, intrusive images and flashbacks, preoccupation, emotional numbing, heightened anxiety to triggers, erratic behavior and sudden mood swings, and difficulty with sleep ...
Class Failure: You fail the class and may not have an option to retake it. Suspension: You are temporarily kicked out of the institution. Expulsion: You are permanently kicked out of the institution. Legal Consequences: You face legal punishment in the form of a fine or worse.
According to some studies, the victims and perpetrators of infidelity frequently experience "negative intrapersonal outcomes," such as a decline in self-esteem, increased risk of mental health problems, guilt and depression, explained an April 2014 study published in the peer-reviewed Journal of Family Psychology.
"Researchers find that partnerships characterized by dissatisfaction, unfulfilling sex, and high conflict are at higher risk for infidelity," she says. "Also, the more dissimilar partners are—in terms of personality, education level, and other factors—the more likely they are to experience infidelity."
Many professionals have seen marriages not only survive infidelity but become better than before. It is true that a marriage can survive an extra-marital affair. But, this will only happen if both partners are willing to acquire and use the skills necessary to make their marriage successful.
Know That You Aren't a Bad Person
"Cheating is a very serious thing. It's a very big deal, and you should take the time to really sift through all of those feelings and reactions you're having," said Gloria. "At the same time, you also need to recognize that this doesn't make you a categorically terrible person.
How Many Couples Stay Together After an Affair? In one study, researchers found that with instances of secret infidelity, only about 20% of couples were still married after 5 years. However, for couples who revealed infidelity, that percentage jumped to 57%.