Jealous people are often non-confrontational. They may even come across as super-friendly; they fight their fight against you underhandedly. They will downplay your achievements, spread malicious gossip about you, or just talk crap regarding you behind your back.
A jealous person will do anything to make you feel bad about yourself and what you have going for you. They try to undermine your successes by making them seem less important, or they might even express their displeasure in a way that makes it seem like they're not jealous at all.
One of the worst signs someone secretly envies you is that they constantly parasite off your energy and time. No matter how much you help them, they just seem to want to take and take. In some situations, it's not just that they're a needy person. It's that they're jealous of your stability, resources and life.
Jealousy can be triggered by many factors. Perhaps the most common trigger is when someone feels a personal threat aimed at a relationship that they value. This threat comes from a third party and makes someone feel as if they are being replaced. Our brains commonly link jealousy to romantic relationships.
Unhealthy jealous behavior happens when we indulge that feeling and act impulsively from a place of suspicion and insecurity. When insecurity in our relationships run rampant, jealousy can rapidly grow into paranoia and obsession and threaten to destroy the very relationship we're most afraid to lose.
Envy drives to self-sabotage, causing wars and other conflicts. It typically becomes a group phenomenon, and turns to hatred and assaults against others, as Frank J. Ninivaggi explains on Envy Theories. We have a false sense of justice — our system emphasizes the equality of all.
People might begin to hate another person or group when they: Feel envy or want what the other person has. They may consider it unfair that someone has what they lack. Have contempt for another person or believe them to be inferior.
In a weird way, jealousy can be used as a “red flag” to “encourage you to do a little self-exploration.” That is, if you can acknowledge it before it becomes toxic to your relationship. Degges-White says, "Simply put, jealousy is motivated by fear.
Research has identified many root causes of extreme jealousy, including low self-esteem, high neuroticism, and feeling possessive of others, particularly romantic partners. Fear of abandonment is also a key motivator.
The initial stage of jealousy and envy involves an individual having a desire for what another person has. When this feeling is not controlled or tended to, it develops into disdain or scorn for the other person simply because they remind the individual of what they are lacking.
They talk a good game, but narcissists actually have very low self-esteem. Low self-worth/confidence/esteem is at the core of a narcissism. This low sense of self naturally makes it extremely easy for them to become jealous – very jealous.
Your Heart. According to Jonathan Dvash, neuroscientist at the University of Haifa, the sympathetic nervous system buckles under the stress of jealousy, quickening the heart and spiking blood pressure.
We know that feeling jealous or envious can lead to feelings of anxiety, worthlessness, and even acts of verbal or physical abuse. And it's not just the person feeling jealous whose psyche is damaged–it's the person who is the object of jealousy and envy, too. Jealousy and envy are dangerous.
