You may have come across a narcissistic or sociopathic personality type. Narcissists and sociopaths are notorious for engaging in both emotional and physical infidelity. Not only are narcissists players and pick-up artists in the dating world, they are also serial cheaters in relationships.
Not all narcissists cheat, but rates of infidelity are higher among them. Unlike conventional cheaters, narcissistic cheaters can feel greater self-entitlement, impulsivity, suffer from control issues, and experience a lack of empathy and remorse.
Some narcissists keep affairs going for years, whilst retaining a seemingly normal married life. The narcissists' affair is often aware they're married.
While it's not impossible for a narcissist to be faithful, it is unlikely due to their self-centered nature and lack of empathy. If you're in a relationship with a narcissist, it's important to be aware of these traits so that you can protect yourself and your relationship.
Can a Narcissist Ever Be Happy in a Relationship? While it may be possible for a narcissist to develop feelings of love towards someone else, they struggle to maintain lasting relationships due to their lack of empathy and tendency towards selfishness.
It may sound harsh, but many of the features of NPD are antithetical to love. Narcissists may show you love and act in loving ways, but this tends to be conditional, in that displays of love depend on what you can give them in return. For people with NPD, relationships tend to be transactional.
But as clinical psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula points out, narcissists often have a habit of staying in contact with their exes in a way that is solely about their own needs. "The central motivator for narcissists is validation," she explains. "And an ex is often a really interesting place to get it...
Breakups with narcissists don't always end the relationship. Many won't let you go, even when they are the ones who left the relationship, and even when they're with a new partner. They won't accept “no.” They hoover in an attempt to rekindle the relationship or stay friends after a breakup or divorce.
It is common for people with a narcissistic personality disorder to regret discarding or losing someone, but it does not mean what you might think. If they feel regret, it is not because they hurt you.
Narcissists thirst for attention and supply is virtually unquenchable. And often their partners cannot provide enough on their own. Not all narcissists cheat, but many do. Flirting could be a sign of their intentions to cheat.
Narcissism and Cheating Occur Because the Narcissists Feel the Need to Devalue Their Partner. With narcissism and cheating, it isn't bad enough that the narcissist is seeking validation from someone else, but they'll also start devaluing their partner at the same time.
By remaining friends with their exes, narcissists get to keep all of their former partners on a carousel of convenience: they can create a harem of people to use for sex, money, praise, attention or whatever else they desire, at any time.
For most people, a partner's level of warmth and trustworthiness is the most important factor in determining relationship satisfaction. A study found that narcissists were the happiest with "trophy" partners, high in physical attractiveness and status.
In fact, narcissists are often attracted to strong, confident, and self-assured women. While this may seem counterintuitive, it is important to realize that the narcissistic traits of grandiosity and confidence are really a mask for deep insecurity.
Long-term relationships are boring to narcissists. They are drawn by the chase and may idealize the partners they can't have. They may appear to be charming, generous, and caring at first. But when they have you, they begin to get bored and to look for your faults.
The best way to shut down a narcissist is to walk away from them. If all else fails, you can physically remove yourself from the conversation. Even if they keep talking, simply turn around and walk away. If they follow you, close the door.
Narcissistic relationships can last anywhere from a few days or weeks to many years. There are anecdotal observations suggesting that the average length of a narcissistic relationship is around six months, but no empirical evidence supports this claim.
Narcissists can't take rejection and they see it as a personal attraction to their character. Even after long periods of the breakup, they can't accept the fact that you're moving on. Now that you're seeing someone else, your narcissistic ex would act like a predator.
They can have deep regret for failed relationships and they may feel loss very deeply. But they feel that regret and loss only insofar as they relate to their own agenda and feelings. Their remorse points inward. They may feel very sad that they lost someone and they may genuinely miss that person.
For a person who is narcissistic, their self-esteem is often tied to your relationship with them. When they see that you have moved on and are now dating someone else, they will feel jealous and threatened.
Narcissists' sexual preferences are often very specific. In bed, the narcissist may have very explicit ideas about what their partner should do or even say. They want the narrative to play out in a certain way, and they don't have patience for changes to the script. This has to do with their lack of empathy.
They get jealous about everything
They talk a good game, but narcissists actually have very low self-esteem. Low self-worth/confidence/esteem is at the core of a narcissism. This low sense of self naturally makes it extremely easy for them to become jealous – very jealous.
The short answer is a simple “no.” It is actually highly unlikely that your narcissistic partner is even capable of real love, let alone feels it towards you past the beginning of your relationship.