INFJs can get so consumed with self-loathing that all we feel is hurt, shame, and despair when friendships between other people appear to affirm our negative thoughts. We may become so tightly bound up in our own fears and insecurities that we take it out on ourselves.
INFJs feel insecure when they receive criticism or are faced with conflict or confrontation. They want to live in a harmonious atmosphere as much as possible, and they tend to take criticism very personally as children.
Anxious Pre- Occupied, Avoidant, Fearful are insecure personality types. Anxious Pre- Occupied can be the most expressive in their behavior when they feel real or imagined that they are going to be abandoned. The Avoidant type can come across as independent, confident, needing and wanting their space and autonomy.
At their best, INFJs make modest, reliable teammates, and allow others to take the lead. INFJs may undervalue their own needs, ideas, and contributions, acting overly shy and not taking credit when due. At their worst, INFJs can be excessively submissive, ineffectual, and too dependent on direction from others.
As one of the rarest personality types, they have a difficult time meeting someone like them in their careers, families, or other social groups. INFJs carry a burden few others will ever share. They often feel like they don't fit in, can't be “seen,” or aren't accepted as they truly are.
They tend to be gracious and friendly to people, and if they are confident, they may even have a gift for flirting and making eye contact. However, time and time again, INFJs have told me that they get uncomfortably awkward around their crushes.
INFJs also feel embarrassed when they cry in front of others or react emotionally to criticism. They also experience “second-hand embarrassment”. This occurs when they empathize too strongly with someone who has done something awkward or is embarrassing themselves.
Kindness. As sensitive personalities, INFJs feel attracted to people who show kindness towards others.
They are also quiet but fierce hardworking perfectionists who dream big and achieve their goals. Because they are often reserved, high-achieving individuals with high expectations of both themselves and others, INFJs can be intimidating to other personality types.
INFPs and INFJs are commonly confused for one another due to their apparent commitment to sensitivity, forming deep relationships and helping others navigate the world. Though, while INFPs and INFJs may seem similar at first glance, these two personality types possess distinctions which set them apart.
INFJs are complex because different aspects of their personalities seem to contradict one another. However, these traits are also what make INFJs fascinating. Learn why the INFJ Personality type is the most complex Myers-Briggs Personality Type.
Those who are extroverted, sensing, feeling, and judging are often identified as one of the kindest types by experts. "ESFJs have extroverted feeling as a dominant cognitive function," Gonzalez-Berrios says. "This makes them rule by their hearts. They are kind, polite, friendly, and sensitive."
Borderline personality disorder (BPD), also known as emotionally unstable personality disorder (EUPD), is a personality disorder characterized by a long-term pattern of intense and unstable interpersonal relationships, distorted sense of self, and strong emotional reactions.
They tend to dislike last-minute changes and repeated mistakes, which they see as thoughtless or uncaring. At work, INFJs may find it difficult to keep their personal feelings out of their interactions with others. They'll likely become stressed if they feel unappreciated, dismissed, or ignored.
Basic Fear: Of being worthless, unloved, or unwanted. Basic Desire: To know they are loved. These INFJs tend to appear more jovial and extroverted than some other INFJs. They are very people-oriented and lean heavily on their secondary function: Extraverted Feeling (Fe).
Over time, the INFJ becomes overwhelmed by their emotions. That overwhelming hurt is what causes the INFJ door slam. The INFJ door slam happens when an INFJ “slams the door” on your relationship. They shut down and block you out, often with little or no explanation.
INFJs are enigmas to other types, and sometimes the way they think, speak, or function can look outwardly awkward. Most of these behaviors are easy to explain when they're analyzed. So if you or someone you know is an INFJ, remember not to dismiss these habits as awkward, but as evidence of how you tick.
INFP is the type most commonly mistaken for INFJ, and they use Ne as their co-pilot process. If Signs 1 and 5 are both sound true for you there's a very good chance you're an INFP.
INFJs are no exception to this rule, and when they become overly stressed they may display a dark side that includes angry outbursts, obsessive worrying, perfectionism, or even depression. When INFJs first encounter stress, they start to behave very true-to-type.
The famous INFJ door slam
But when you've pushed them too far, taking advantage of their giving nature once too often or badgering them into doing things they don't want to do, they will resort to the INFJ door slam. The INFJ door slam is when an INFJ cuts you out of their life permanently.
If an INFJ is working from a healthy place, (s)he will likely be looking for these qualities in a relationship: openness and honesty, patience, genuineness, a minimum level of intellectual compatibility, good communication, friendship, perceptivity and receptiveness from his/her partner, some level of interest in ...
Ni-dominant types (INTJs and INFJs) often need considerable quiet time to themselves to think and focus. Interruptions, noise, and excessive sensory stimulation will push an INFJ to the edge of their comfort zone.
In addition to being highly sensitive (sometimes to an extreme degree), many INFJs also struggle with high amounts of anxiety and depression. A lot of INFJs report that they experience a low-key depression running in the background of their lives, even when it appears that everything is going well on the surface.
If you're an INFJ, you suppress your anger. “The Counselor” type will avoid addressing their feelings of frustration because they hate conflict, and the idea of confronting someone might break them out in hives.