Being nice is a positive trait to have. As humans, we truly appreciate and value supportive and compassionate friends and family. But when the balance is off, it can be detrimental to yourself, and even to those you think you are doing the right thing by.
You can be a good person with toxic traits. In fact, everyone displays negative behavior from time to time. Many people also develop toxic traits as a coping mechanism. For example, many dishonest people lie about their lives to protect themselves from other people's judgment.
Sometimes, too nice really is a red flag. Someone who seems too nice could actually be love bombing you, an early warning sign of abuse, for instance. "Although on the surface, you may feel someone is too nice, it's actually your intuition trying to give you a subtle warning that something is off," Nikhade says.
Williams syndrome is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by hypersociability and unique neurocognitive abnormalities. One of the characteristics of Williams syndrome is an inappropriate increase in social behavior. People with the syndrome may be overly friendly, even to strangers.
"Most of us want someone who we can imagine being a kind partner or parent in the future," dating and intimacy coach Erika Davian tells Popsugar. "But when someone is too nice, it conveys a lack of boundaries. It may be a signal that they are not taking care of themselves and their own needs first."
Being 'too nice' can be a disadvantage if you don't set boundaries at work and can even have negative consequences for your work life. Some of these negative consequences can be that you are not compensated for your work, you get taken advantage of, you get overlooked and you could get more tasks dumped on your plate.
Lower levels of intimacy. Always being nice (and demanding niceness from others) is a very clever defense mechanism that prevents real intimacy by inhibiting going to levels that are deeper than nice.
Being nice is referred to as 'agreeableness' in the world of academic psychology. This attribute is viewed as a stable personality characteristic rather than something that fluctuates across situations. In fact, agreeableness is one of the 'Big Five' personality elements. In short, agreeableness is good for you.
Everyone around knows it, and so do you, but instead, you say they're great. Proverbs 27:6 tells us, “The wounds of a friend are trustworthy, but the kisses of an enemy are excessive.”
Red flags in a relationship include excessive jealousy and frequent lying. You should also be wary of a partner who frequently criticizes you or puts you down. Another major red flag is an unwillingness to compromise — relationships shouldn't be one-sided.
Kindness can become toxic when making others comfortable becomes a priority and boundaries get faded. This mindset results in trying to keep your relationships conflict-free and to achieve that overly-kind people will let their boundaries get stepped over to keep it peaceful.
People pleasing might seem harmless, but it can lead to serious health risks — both mental and physical — especially when taken to the extremes. First, people-pleasers rarely prioritize their own self-care.
People who are 'too nice' often avoid sharing their ideas due to fear of rejection, judgement, or the (false) belief that it's selfish or controlling to do so. When the relationship is deprived of that creative energy it slowly starves over time, becoming stagnant, dull & lifeless. It also leads to disconnection.
"It's nothing", "no problem", "no worries", "don't mention it", "not at all" or "sure thing": These are all common responses and most people wouldn't think twice if you use one of those.
POSITIVE EMOTIONS AND NEGATIVE EMOTION REGULATION
In other words, positive emotions might “correct” or “undo” the aftereffects of negative emotions; we call this the undoing hypothesis (Fredrickson & Levenson, 1998; Levenson, 1988).
Why kindness in the context of the workplace is often taken for weakness. As if being kind, means being soft and indecisive. As if being kind means you are not able to deliver the best work. As if helping others must mean they are not capable enough.
Being too nice may make one likable and easy to get along with. This can provide a sense of happiness and relaxation. It can make people accommodate easily for things without affecting them. The nice ones know that the extra effort is worth it.
Being rude to anyone is a big turn off for women. Whether it's a waitress, a bartender, a stranger. She will take notes of how rude you were with someone when you both were together and it will very much make her lose interest in you.
Men prefer a woman who can stay calm and relaxed. Beauty is more than make-up and a fancy haircut. Men find women more attractive when they are neat and clean. Men find women who smell nice, who have clean hair and hydrated skin more attractive than a face perfectly covered in makeup.
Women love confidence, but not the showing off kind. When you're standing tall, but sitting back, and quietly taking your surroundings in… that's sexy as hell. Of all the turn ons for girls, self-confidence is arguably the most important.