When the narcissist receives any resistance or discomfort, they leave. Fears abandonment. Even if the departure is for a few minutes, the narcissist suddenly realizes that their exit means further complications.
In psychology, narcissistic withdrawal is a stage in narcissism and a narcissistic defense characterized by "turning away from parental figures, and by the fantasy that essential needs can be satisfied by the individual alone". In adulthood, it is more likely to be an ego defense with repressed origins.
Narcissists protect their image.
A person who is sick is beneath the average person and therefore is not someone they can associate. This is why many narcissists abandon their spouse at the first sign of any type of long-term illness.
We found that many narcissists, instead of reacting with grandiose responses, reacted vulnerably. Rather than reacting with the threat of abandoning their partners, they commonly reacted with the fear of being abandoned.
THE BASICS
Grooming a person, manipulating her into doubting her feelings, generating shame regarding her best qualities, and manipulatively creating dependency are four ways a narcissist destroys a person from the inside out.
Narcissistic rage occurs when a narcissist is confronted with contrary beliefs about their perceived importance or grandiosity. The narcissist is injured, and responds with anger. Being on the receiving end of this rage can produce feelings ranging from anxiety to downright terror.
Narcissists often look for victims who struggle with insecurity and low self-esteem. People who think less of themselves and struggle with the “I am not enough” mindset tend to attract toxic partners. People with self-esteem issues tend to think of themselves as imperfect or unlovable.
They're utterly delusional in believing that you couldn't possibly want to be with anyone else because there is no one better than them. Because you've moved on to someone new, your new partner serves as a constant reminder that they were not good enough for you, so they'll launch an attack against them.
Narcissistic collapse happens when a person with narcissistic personality disorder experiences a failure, humiliation, or other blow to their secretly fragile self-esteem. Depending on the type of narcissist, collapse may look different and happen more frequently.
As an adult, theperson with NPD is terrified of rejection, abandonment, and criticism. Their childhood was fraught with rejecting and abandoning behaviors by their primary attachment figure(s).
Narcissists are motivated by feeling superior and expanding their power, and so the only things that matter when helping others are receiving adulation, fame, influence, opportunities, notoriety, and other resources. They dont actually care about others because to them other people are just things to use.
Unfortunately for you, narcissists don't like being alone; they're always searching for a source of supply, someone that can make them feel better about themselves. Sometimes they'll find a new source, but often they'll come back to you.
So, a serious illness or is like manna from heaven for a narcissist. They can demand almost unlimited attention from their family and carers, even potentially regaining control of adult children who have fled the nest and all of them have to, because who would ignore a sick or dying parent?
There are early sometimes subtle signs the narcissist may be finished with you and more obvious absolute signals. The narcissist often ignores what you say almost as if you never spoke. The narcissist stops texting back to you or delays for days. The narcissist does not make eye contact with you.
Reconnecting with support people — friends and family can provide support when the narcissist withholds. Practice self-care — putting yourself first should be a priority. Accept reality — working through the gaslighting, lying, and manipulation and seeing the relationship as it truly is will be essential.
Narcissistic Abuse Isolates You From the Outside World
Seeking continuously (as in every hour of every day) to convince others, and perhaps even more themselves, that their false mask of superiority is real, narcissists isolate those close to them to control what “their loved ones” reflect and reveal about them.
Signs of narcissistic collapse include: Stonewalling the other person (completely withdrawing from the conversation, often without warning) Gaslighting. Repeatedly accusing someone or something else for hurting them.
Exhaustion plays a major role in the mini-cycles. His energy depleted, his creativity at its end, his resources stretched to the maximum, the narcissist reposes, "plays dead", withdraws from life. This is the phase of "narcissistic hibernation".
Seeing you move on may feel like they are losing control, which is something narcissists have trouble tolerating. They may send you nasty text messages, emails, voicemails, disparage you to your friends or children, make false allegations against you, and make you feel like you are crazy or incompetent.
Breakups with narcissists don't always end the relationship. Many won't let you go, even when they are the ones who left the relationship, and even when they're with a new partner. They won't accept “no.” They hoover in an attempt to rekindle the relationship or stay friends after a breakup or divorce.
They get jealous about everything
They talk a good game, but narcissists actually have very low self-esteem. Low self-worth/confidence/esteem is at the core of a narcissism. This low sense of self naturally makes it extremely easy for them to become jealous – very jealous.
Narcissists may play the victim if they believe they gain something from making you feel guilty. Their tendency to use manipulation tactics is one of the formal symptoms of narcissistic personality.
Narcissistic Grooming Technique: Isolating you from family and friends. The narcissist will try to isolate you from your support system. He will do this by making negative comments about the people in your life in an attempt to turn you against them. If that fails he will make it difficult for you to see them.
Empaths are drawn to narcissists, and narcissists love taking advantage: "Since narcissists rely on exclusive focus and attention, an empathic person would naturally appeal to them," explains Dorfman.