Coworkers get jealous due to insecurity, feeling inadequate, and making unfavorable social comparisons, often triggered by perceived favoritism, promotions, recognition, or unequal workloads that make them feel undervalued compared to a successful peer. This jealousy stems from a competitive mindset where a coworker's success feels like their own failure, leading to behaviors like undermining, gossip, or one-upping.
That's really what's at the root of jealousy in the workplace: the social comparison theory. The gist of this theory is that we match ourselves up against other people (such as our coworkers) to understand how we're doing, and our perception of that comparison directly impacts our self-image.
Here are some strategies for dealing with workplace jealousy.
Research has identified many root causes of extreme jealousy, including low self-esteem, high neuroticism, and feeling possessive of others, particularly romantic partners. Fear of abandonment is also a key motivator.
They may stutter or sound unsure around you. They will not be as likely to share personal information, or apologize frequently if they feel that they've offended or crossed you. They probably won't joke around with you, and as already pointed out, stop conversations when you approach them.
The biggest red flags at work often center around toxic leadership, poor communication, and a high-turnover culture, signaling deep issues like micromanagement, lack of transparency, burnout, and disrespect, where problems are normalized and employee well-being is ignored in favor of short-term gains. Key indicators include managers who don't support staff, excessive gossip, broken promises, constant negativity, and environments where speaking up feels unsafe or pointless, often leading to high employee churn.
Examples of quiet firing may include:
11 Signs Someone Is Quietly Jealous of You (Even When They Act Supportive)
Jealousy can be a grief response to unmet needs rooted in abandonment trauma. Watching others receive support can reopen wounds of not being chosen or protected. Paying attention to where the jealousy is coming from can help survivors work through it with self-compassion.
Whether such concerns are warranted or not, Turbulent personalities are more likely to let their stress, worry, and self-doubt build into feelings of jealousy. Of all the personality types, Turbulent Debaters (ENTP-T) agreed with our statement the most (73%).
6 Strategies for Dealing With a Toxic Co-Worker
Jealousy comes from deep-seated insecurities, a fear of loss (abandonment, betrayal, or being replaced), low self-esteem, and past traumas, often manifesting as a perceived threat to a valued relationship or possession. It's an emotional response to feeling inadequate or fearing someone important will take away something precious, rooted in a belief that you are not "enough," combined with evolutionary instincts to protect mates and resources, says Mindful Health Solutions, Psychology Today, Reddit users in r/askpsychology, TherapyRoute.com, and Verywell Mind.
The Smart Way to Deal With That Two-Faced Co-worker Who Drives You Nuts
How do you tell if a coworker is jealous of you?
Make alliances with your boss and others in your workplace. Do your best to put in your best work because your work will speak for itself despite your coworkers exaggerations. Your boss will notice. Treat the jealous coworker with respect but set boundaries and choose your battles.
Which personality traits going along with being “the jealous type?” A study published in Frontiers in Psychology suggests that there are people who are high in neuroticism, low in agreeableness, and low in openness are more likely to be jealous in their romantic relationships.
Jealousy is a complex emotion that can arise in many areas of life—relationships, careers, friendships, and even self-perception. While often viewed negatively, jealousy is a natural human response that can provide valuable insight into our insecurities, unmet needs, and emotional triggers.
Signs of childhood trauma
People that are prone to intense jealousy or possessiveness often harbor feelings of inadequacy or inferiority and have a tendency to compare themselves to others. Jealousy, at its core, is a byproduct of fear, fear of not being good enough, fear of loss.
It's no fun to feel envy or jealousy because both make you feel inadequate. Envy is when you want what someone else has, but jealousy is when you're worried someone's trying to take what you have. If you want your neighbor's new convertible, you feel envy.
The pre-quitting behaviors that made the cut are below:
The "3-month rule" in a job refers to the common probationary period where employers assess a new hire's performance, skills, and cultural fit, while the employee learns the role and decides if the job is right for them; it's a crucial time for observation, feedback, and proving value, often with potential limitations on benefits until the period ends. It's also advice for new hires to "hang in there" for three months to get acclimated and evaluate the job before making big decisions.
The aim of quiet retaliation is to undermine the employee's confidence, isolate them socially and make their working life difficult enough that they back off on the concerns they've raised or leave the company voluntarily.