Narcissists may use the
They do this in order to discredit, confuse and frustrate you, distract you from the main problem and make you feel guilty for being a human being with actual thoughts and feelings that might differ from their own. In their eyes, you are the problem if you happen to exist.
Let them know that if they continue to use the silent treatment against you, the relationship will come to an end. 2. Don't engage – Engaging with a narcissist when they are giving you the silent treatment will only prolong their pity party. It's best not to respond back with anything at all.
One of the main reasons why a narcissist ignores you is that they want to control you. More likely, they want to regain control of you. A narcissist uses ignoring people as a way to punish them. Especially if they feel like you are pulling away.
If you have the energy, acknowledge the narcissist's feelings and let them know what they're feeling has significance. Encourage them to talk about how they're feeling and work toward having a conversation about how the silent treatment affects you and better ways to get your feelings across than the silent treatment.
If you didn't know already, the silent treatment is when someone refuses to communicate verbally and/or electronically with someone who is willing to communicate. A narcissist's silent treatment can last for hours, days, weeks, or even months.
A narcissist may have a breakdown if their supply is cut off and they feel vulnerable, embarrassed, or out of control. Narcissistic breakdown symptoms can include rage, impulsive behaviors, or other ways of showcasing intense mental suffering.
Well, silence can be a powerful tool when dealing with a narcissist. If they are used to dominating the conversation, silence can make them uncomfortable. You can force them to confront their behavior and make them fear you by remaining silent.
It is to make the victim acquiesce to self-erasure and scramble to meet the needs of their abuser, however unhealthy or damaging those may be. Moreover, it is a form of intermittent reinforcement that causes the victim to walk on eggshells.
While it is completely understandable, it is a dangerous approach because it can cause people to use ineffective techniques, like the silent treatment, against the narcissist in their life. The silent treatment is one of the most ineffective techniques that you could use on the narcissist in your life.
When a narcissist ignores needs in a relationship, they do this to deliberately to set up their future self with a source of supply. Ignoring you means they win. Narcissists enjoy that you wish to discuss things with them. The greater your reaction to their obtuse behavior, the greater the supply for them.
Ignoring a narcissist may result in them trying to get your attention through various means, including apologizing and begging for forgiveness or smearing you to others. If you want a narcissist to go away, you must ignore them consistently and permanently, or they will likely try to hoover you back into their life.
But here is the rub: Over time, the narcissist usually senses that you are pulling away, and it is then that your problems take on a different form. Narcissists hate feeling that they might be rejected or that you might conclude that they are defective. So, they go into compensation mode by turning the tables.
If you haven't blocked them, a narcissist will send a random text out of the blue, usually one word. They do this to see if they can elicit a response. When you respond to their text, they disappear. This is another way to hurt and devalue you.
They don't stop talking
Since narcissists are constantly seeking approval and favor from their audience, Behary says their constant talking will sound more like a lecture than a conversation. "There's so much showing off and wanting to appear to be very smart, special, knowledgeable, and intuitive," she explains.
In most cases, the narcissist will come back at you immediately after you put in place the no contact rule. Considering how important their ego is to them and how they need that constant attention from their partner, they would come for you immediately.
At the end of a relationship, a narcissist will often spiral down a long-winded gauntlet of manipulation tactics. They may blame you for causing the relationship to fail, work hard to keep you to stay with them, make lofty promises to change their behavior, or badmouth you to everyone around them.
Things You Should Know
A narcissist is likely to be enraged when they begin to lose control. They may lash out at you, go on a smear campaign, or purposefully ignore you.
If someone displays unmanageable emotions and easily flies off the handle, this is a serious red flag. Responding with uncontrollable rage or the "silent treatment" could point to abusive (physical or emotional) behavior in the future, says Trombetti.
If you can safely do so, walk away when your partner gives you the silent treatment and do something you enjoy. If your partner is unwilling to change, it is important that you make your emotional and physical safety a priority.
This may be a given, but there is a wide variety of overwhelming emotions that come with being ignored. Feelings of loneliness, low self-esteem, and despair can occur. The effects of silent treatment as abuse can also contribute to depression, chronic fatigue syndrome, and fibromyalgia.