INFP: People-pleasing The biggest turn-off for INFPs is people-pleasing. INFPs are independent and individualistic in their beliefs and values. They want people to be authentic and true to themselves, even if they risk offending others.
The tendency to please is related to Dependent Personality Disorder. While the people-pleaser may not need others to do things for them, they do have a need for others, regardless. The pleasing personality is also related to the Masochistic Personality type, which also corresponds with Dependent Personality.
1. ESFJ. People who fit the ESFJ personality type can usually be recognized by their big hearts and kindly manner. ESFJs are warm and welcoming and their love of tradition means they value good old-fashioned manners highly.
It is a natural human instinct to want to please others and to present oneself at one's best. It is, in fact, a very positive quality to consider others' feelings and be emotionally intelligent.
People with the ESFJ personality type are the stereotypical extroverts. They are social butterflies, and their need to interact with others and make people happy usually ends up making them popular.
ISFPs are quiet, reserved types who like to focus their attention on people and the experiences they enjoy. They aren't typically big talkers unless someone they're talking about something deeply important to them or they're trying to empathize verbally with someone.
"ESFJs are social creatures with a lot of love for routine. They tend to be sensitive and feel most awkward when they think they are the butt of someone's joke or are not having their feelings in a friendship or relationship reciprocated," says Owens.
Anxiety: Some people may attempt to please others because they feel anxious about fitting in, rejection, or causing offense. For example, a person with social anxiety may feel they must do whatever their friends want in order for people to like them. It can be a subtle attempt to control others' perceptions.
It is true that opposites attract. People who like to please are frequently drawn to people who like to control others. Pleasers have certain personality characteristics that are developed in childhood. They are often perfectionists who were influenced by very demanding parental expectations and/or criticism.
Narcissism demands to be fed and people pleasers are the best source. Contrary to the outward appearance of self-reliance, determination, and independence, narcissists internally crave approval from others. They need a constant daily supply of attention, admiration, and affection.
People with an Enneagram Type 1 personality tend to be rational, principled, and judicial in their behavior. They usually have a desire for justice and equality. They are motivated by a strong sense of right and wrong.
Statistically speaking, Assertive Virtuosos (ISTP-As), Architects (INTJ-As), and Logisticians (ISTJ-As) are the least likely to seek affection from everyone, while Turbulent Campaigners (ENFP-Ts) and Entertainers (ESFP-Ts) are the most likely.
05/7Libra. They are natural-born people pleasers and go out of their way to keep the peace and make others happy. They are great listeners and are skilled at finding common ground in disagreements.
A fourth, less discussed, response to trauma is called fawning, or people-pleasing. The fawn response is a coping mechanism in which individuals develop people-pleasing behaviors to avoid conflict, pacify their abusers, and create a sense of safety.
Whatever the specific cause of their behavior, people pleasers tend to have similar characteristics, which include: Fear of abandonment or rejection. Preoccupation with what others might be thinking or feeling. Fear of setting limits, saying no or seeming mean.
It is not. The neglect of others (narcissism) is selfish and causes unnecessary distance, confrontation and lack of intimacy. The neglect of self (people pleasing) creates unwanted exhaustion, increased anxiety and also contributes to a lack of intimacy.
ADHD and Emotions
They can hyper-focus on strong feelings. However, when you combine strong emotions with feelings of being disempowered throughout life, the mind can hyperfocus on the fears of letting others down (enter people pleasing).
While people pleasing or “being too nice” could be seen as a sign of someone who is a really good person and cares for others, their ability to bend backwards for other people, not say no and struggle to have boundaries with others can actually be a big red flag and cause issues in a relationship in the long term if ...
People-pleasers are often extremely empathic and attuned to others' needs. A people-pleaser therefore tends to pursue intimate, affectionate, and confiding relationships. These people have a strong desire for external validation and avoid, or are sensitive to, situations where conflict may arise.
People Pleasers spend so much time and effort in taking care of others. Unfortunately, they often do not establish good social support for themselves. They also find it hard to give up control and let other people take care of them. While taking care of others in noble and rewarding, it can also be toxic and unhealthy.
Esfj: Gossip
You're known for being a constant source of encouragement among your friends, and you feel most at home in a big group of people. One thing to be careful of is your judgmental side: Since you're constantly interacting with others, spilling one friend's secret to another can be tempting.
We start off with INFPs and INFJs: two Introverted personalities that often experience bouts of anxiety. When it comes to these types, their anxiety can stem from an inclination to overthinking.
INTJs are often misunderstood simply because there are so few of them around. Making up only 2.1% of the US population, they understand the world in a fundamentally different way than most other types. While the rest of the world looks first to tangible data, INTJs follow symbols and underlying meanings first.
Dark personality traits include psychopathy, machiavellianism and narcissism, collectively called the "dark triad".