Particularly in chronic trauma—continued exposure to domestic violence, abuse of any form, war, poverty, and others—victims usually reported that they felt powerless to stop or change their circumstances. Victims of chronic trauma may lose the ability to make decisions in their lives.
Over-protective or helicopter parenting. Physical, sexual, or emotional abuse, bullying, or taunting.
Control issues could stem from high anxiety, obsessive-compulsive symptoms, or other mental health conditions. Some people with control issues will attempt to micromanage every aspect of a situation. Other people will want no say in the situation and demand that others make all of the decisions.
As for personality disorders, control issues are common. Controlling behaviors are symptoms of several personality disorders, including histrionic personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, and narcissistic personality disorder.
If you have PTSD, you may not be aware of how your thoughts and beliefs have been affected by trauma. For instance, since the trauma you may feel a greater need to control your surroundings. This may lead you to act inflexibly toward others. Your actions then provoke others into becoming hostile towards you.
With PTSD and anger, common symptoms include irritable behavior and angry outbursts (with little or no provocation). These are typically expressed as verbal or physical aggression toward people or objects. Another potential symptom is reckless or self-destructive behavior.
Controlling behaviors can also be a symptom of several personality disorders, such as histrionic p ersonality, borderline personality, and narcissistic personality. These disorders can only be diagnosed by a licensed health care professional.
People with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) may also have a strong need to control everything in an attempt to reduce anxiety and fears.
Fear of losing control involves fears that something a person does or fails to do will cause harm to oneself or others, will have a negative impact, or that one's lack of diligence in maintaining control will somehow impact the world around them. The fear of losing control is one that underpins many subtypes of OCD.
In terms of personality-type theory, control freaks are very much the Type A personality, driven by the need to dominate and control. An obsessive need to control others is also associated with antisocial personality disorder.
A study of young adults found that childhood trauma was significantly correlated with elevated psychological distress, increased sleep disturbances, reduced emotional well-being, and lower perceived social support.
A person with a “controlling personality” is driven by high levels of anxiety to feel safe. Though the need for control might be an unconscious feeling, the anxiety can create a strong desire to control surroundings and other people to keep a sense of order.
A histrionic personality disorder, or commonly known as a dramatic personality disorder, is a psychiatric disorder distinguished by a pattern of exaggerated emotionality and attention-seeking behaviors. A histrionic personality disorder is categorized within the "Cluster B" of personality disorders.
Often, the person with BPD will react towards loved ones as if they were the abusers from their past, and take out vengeance and anger towards them. When the person with BPD feels abandoned, they can become abusive or controlling as a way to defend against feelings of abandonment or feeling unworthy.
Summary. Controlling people attempt to assert power and control over others through manipulative tactics such as blaming, being critical, and shutting others down. They may not be aware they are exhibiting this behavior, which often stems from their own anxiety.
And often, being out-of-control or losing control often translates to losing “comfort” (e.g., feeling sad, disappointed, angry); these eight unpleasant emotions move you away from comfort and into an emotional state that feels painful or uncomfortable.
Attempting to control their own feelings, they find themselves trying to control the behavior of people they depend upon and care about. Repeated again and again, these patterns of behavior become ingrained.
Intrusive memories
Recurrent, unwanted distressing memories of the traumatic event. Reliving the traumatic event as if it were happening again (flashbacks) Upsetting dreams or nightmares about the traumatic event. Severe emotional distress or physical reactions to something that reminds you of the traumatic event.
If you often feel as though your life has become unmanageable, this could be a sign that you have some unresolved emotional trauma. Emotional overreactions are a common symptom of trauma. A victim of trauma might redirect their overwhelming emotions towards others, such as family and friends.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD): Being subjected to constant yelling and verbal abuse can cause symptoms of PTSD. Symptoms can include insomnia, feeling the need to be on guard, getting easily startled and displaying self-destructive behavior.