A funeral wake is simply a gathering of mournersA mourner is someone who is attending a funeral or who is otherwise recognized as in a period of grief and mourning prescribed either by religious law or by popular custom.https://en.wikipedia.org › wiki › Mourner
Irish wakes are a celebration of life - one last party to honor the deceased. The name “wake” originated because unknown diseases had plagued the countryside causing some to appear dead. As the family began to mourn, they would awaken. For this reason, the body is waked in the deceased's home for at least one night.
For example, a wake is a more informal time for visitation and remembrance of the dead, whereas a funeral typically contains structured rituals and is often religious in nature. It's common for a family to have both a wake and a funeral in order to commemorate the death of a loved one.
A wake, also known as a viewing, visitation or gathering, typically occurs before the funeral takes place. An urn or a casket is typically present, and the casket may be opened or closed. At this time, people pay their respects and offer condolences to loved ones of the departed.
The term originally referred to a late-night prayer vigil but is now mostly used for the social interactions accompanying a funeral. While the modern usage of the verb wake is "become or stay alert", a wake for the dead harks back to the vigil, "watch" or "guard" of earlier times.
Dress nicely, but you don't need to be too formal. The standard protocol for a funeral visitation is to stop by, introduce yourself to the family (if needed) and pay your condolences, and then leave after a short period of time.
What is appropriate to wear to a wake? A wake is a formal occasion, and your attire should reflect that. Any sort of business clothes such as a shirt and tie, a dress, nice pants and a top in dark colors would be suitable and appropriate. Avoid bright colors and clothing that is revealing or flamboyant.
According to the The Funeral Source, it is appropriate for guests to stay at the wake for as little as 15 to 20 minutes. However, you should use your own discretion upon deciding when to leave. If you're close with the family, you may want to stay longer. Offer to help and socialize with the other guests at the wake.
When You Should Attend Just the Wake or Just the Funeral. Someone wise once said that you should attend the wake if you would like to show support to the survivors. You should attend the funeral if you need to grieve yourself. If you find yourself in both camps, attend both the wake and the funeral.
Generally speaking, the public is invited to attend a wake, even if there's no personal connection. On the contrary, funerals tend to be more intimate with close friends and family in attendance.
A modern wake is, essentially, a celebration of the deceased. Friends and family gather together. A wake involves good food, good friends, and, above all, laughter. It's a time for swapping stories about the person who has died; sometimes serious stories, sometimes humorous ones.
A wake is a Catholic tradition, while people of any faith can do viewing. A funeral wake is typically led by clergy or a priest, whereas a viewing will not. Another difference is that viewing is an informal event, while a funeral wake might be either an informal or formal event.
Wakes are generally more casual and interactive than funeral services, which are more structured around certain rituals. Many families will have both a wake and a funeral, with the wake taking place the day before the funeral service or afterward at the families' home.
Separate from a memorial service, a funeral reception is a special event for family members and friends to honor the deceased without a formalized structure. The gathering after a funeral usually has food and drinks and serves as a venue to offer one's condolences to the family. This is also commonly known as a repast.
A wake is often, but not always, held in a place where refreshments are available or expected. Depending on your culture, religion and lifestyle alcoholic beverages may, or may not, be acceptable. If the wake's being held in a pub, then that's usually a sign it's okay to raise a glass (or two).
Should I attend both the wake and the funeral? It is respectful to attend both, but not compulsory. If you don't feel comfortable attending the wake, or you have a prior commitment you can't avoid, it's polite to let the grieving family know in advance – a phone call or message is usually appropriate.
It's common for people to give money at birthdays, weddings, but at funerals giving money isn't always a respectful gift. However, the protocols can sometimes be altered and people may still offer money if that's how they feel, or the grieving family needs the help.
“I'm so sorry about your loss. [The deceased] was a good person and they'll be very missed.” “Please accept my deepest condolences for your loss.” “[The deceased] was a wonderful person and I'll miss them very much.”
Can you wear jeans to a funeral? Bottom line: jeans are not appropriate for a funeral. Unless the family requests them, you should avoid wearing denim to a funeral. However, if it's a casual, outdoor service, you can consider a dark (almost black denim) paired with a button-down shirt and blazer.
How Long Should You Stay At a Wake? This is completely up to you. If you are hoping to catch up with other friends and family members to show your support, this is a good time to do so. However, it is perfectly acceptable to leave immediately after paying your respects to the family.
Decorations – There is no need to go overboard when it comes to decorations for a wake. A photograph of the deceased is often enough but you can also have a few vases of flowers on tables or even a few candles.
You won't go wrong with a suit or a simple black or dark-colored dress. Wear something that should honor both the person who died and your own sense of style. Whatever is comfortable to wear.
Typically, a pair of earrings and a necklace are fine. But try not to wear jewellery that is too eye-catching. For this case, simple necklaces and stud earrings are preferred. But if the deceased had gifted you with a piece of jewellery, now would be a good time to wear it, no matter the design.