What Causes Trust Issues? Possible origins of trust issues include low self-esteem, past betrayals, mental health disorders, adverse childhood experiences or traumatic events. Any time your sense of safety or security is threatened, it can cause trust issues to arise.
Childhood trauma involving abuse can make trusting others very difficult. Trust issues can show up as extreme independence, in which you can not allow yourself to trust that someone else will come through for you. You fear being vulnerable like that or relying on someone else.
Paranoid personality disorder (PPD) is a mental health condition marked by a long-term pattern of distrust and suspicion of others without adequate reason to be suspicious (paranoia). People with PPD often believe that others are trying to demean, harm or threaten them.
Trust Issues
You may feel like your partner isn't telling you everything. Or it might seem like there is much you don't know about him (or her), and that he is unwilling to share. If you feel like your partner has a hard time trusting you or telling you the truth (or vice-versa!) it's a serious red flag.
Toxic relationships are characterized by a lack of trust, controlling behaviors, and frequent lying. Often one partner is prioritized instead of coming together as a team.
Someone with trust issues may not be eager to open up or get close to others, even if they long for deep and meaningful relationships. They may have trouble letting themselves go, being vulnerable, and/or being physically intimate.
The bottom line. It's possible to rebuild a relationship after a breach of trust. Whether it's worth it depends on your relationship needs and whether you feel it's possible to trust your partner again. If you do decide to try repairing things, be prepared for things to take some time.
Trust Issues: Psychology and Common Beliefs
A person with trust issues may harbor negative beliefs about trust and may find themselves thinking limiting thoughts, such as: “I can never let my guard down.” “If I open up I will only get hurt again.” “Everybody is out to get me.”
The symptoms of PTSD can cause problems with trust, closeness, communication, and problem solving. These problems may affect the way the survivor acts with others. In turn, the way a loved one responds to him or her affects the trauma survivor.
Poor judgment. We trust people who have knowledge and expertise that we do not have. Sharing your expertise and knowledge can build trust in others. Giving others inaccurate or misleading information will cause them to lose trust quickly.
Many people can pinpoint the event or relationship in question, but others struggle. And most (if not all) struggle to overcome their trust issues. However, it isn't impossible.
Rebuilding trust takes a significant amount of time and patience. It might take us several months or even years to fully be able to trust our loved one again. Along the way, we need to continue working on reestablishing trust slowly under the guidance of family counselors.
Anxiety sabotages both people in the relationship by instilling self-doubt and making the anxious person turn against first themselves, then their partner. Trust issues lead to jealousy, anger and resentment. These thoughts, emotions, and beliefs lead to anxiety-driven behaviors.
If you have difficulty committing to a partner or you keep your partner at a distance you might also have trust issues. Green said "self-sabotaging and relationship-sabotaging behaviors" are worrisome. People with low esteem, anxiety, depression, or loneliness can also have trust issues.
Rage, disrespect, and emotional stonewalling may not be relationship-ending in and of themselves, but continuing patterns can wear people down. An inability or unwillingness to respect your partner's thoughts, beliefs, and feelings can destroy the trust and intimacy in any relationship.
Can there be love without trust? Love doesn't exist without trust in a real relationship. For starters, if you don't trust your partner, jealousy will likely take over your interactions with that person, making it impossible to believe anything they say.
Symptoms may include flashbacks, nightmares and severe anxiety, as well as uncontrollable thoughts about the event. Most people who go through traumatic events may have temporary difficulty adjusting and coping, but with time and good self-care, they usually get better.
From Freyd (2008): Betrayal trauma occurs when the people or institutions on which a person depends for survival significantly violate that person' s trust or well-being: Childhood physical, emotional, or sexual abuse perpetrated by a caregiver are examples of betrayal trauma.
What are trust issues? Having trust issues means that the source of your mistrust and feelings of insecurity are not due to what's happening in the relationship, but are stemming from unresolved wounds you experienced in past relationships.
While it's not always possible for trust issues to be “cured,” their effects can certainly be lessened. Therapy, as well as a deliberate focus on practicing self-compassion and vulnerability, can help someone lessen their natural tendency to distrust others and build (or rebuild) healthy relationships.