Bridal showers aren't required, so if you're not interested, here's how to spread the word. Not every to-be-wed wants a bridal shower, and that's totally their call. While saying "no" to having a bridal shower should be simple in theory, declining a friend or family member's offer to throw you one can be tricky.
The main purpose of the party is for all your female friends to come over (or go out to a restaurant or some other destination) and shower you (Mrs. Bride-To-Be) with gifts in anticipation of your new life as a married woman. As the bride, you can still invite whomever you want.
These days, just about anyone can throw the bridal shower. However, the event is usually hosted by the maid-of-honor, bridesmaids, or the bride or groom's mother. It's also not uncommon for co-workers to host bridal showers. Because of this, brides regularly celebrate with more than one bridal shower.
Despite this, many bridal shower traditions are outdated and worth being skipped over. In fact, the purpose of a bridal shower itself is largely irrelevant, considering most couples already live together and don't particularly need the appliances or dishes they register for.
Traditional etiquette dictates that the maid of honor—not the mother of the bride—should host the shower.
Most bridal showers are usually held three weeks to three months before the wedding. The trick is not to plan it too far in advance or too close to the wedding date.
Man-showers or bro-dal showers, events that celebrate a man's first step into marriage, are increasing in popularity.
The Traditional Bridal Shower Host
The maid of honor isn't the only option, however. Anyone who is close to the bride—including her mother, sister, cousin, grandma, or future mother-in-law—can host. It used to be that immediate family members were never named as official hosts.
In fact, according to our Real Weddings Study, 72 percent of respondents had a shower before their wedding day.
The answer? No, negative, nein, non, not ok. Etiquette says that you can't invite someone to your bridal shower (and expect them to give a gift) but not invite them to the wedding. It's a major faux pas.
Nope, it's not necessary to invite all the women on your wedding guest list. However, the opposite has to be true. It would be poor etiquette to invite someone to your shower and not to your wedding.
Common wedding etiquette indicates that a bride should never host or plan her own bridal shower. The reason for this is that, unlike a bachelorette or engagement party, the entire purpose of a bridal shower is to “shower” the host of honor with gifts.
Bridal showers are popular in the USA and Canada and some brides in the UK also hold a shower. Guests include close female friends and near relatives of the bride. The Mother of the Bride only attends the bridal shower if the bride-to-be specifically invites her. She may want only younger women present.
With that being said, our experience shows us that the average number of guests at a bridal shower is about 25, with 20-30 being the average range. Ultimately, it's up to the bride and bridal shower host to make the final decision.
Traditionally, the mother of the bride doesn't host the bridal shower (the maid of honor typically assumes the chief shower-planning role), however, your daughter will likely want you to be a part of the celebration.
It's totally up to you and your fiancé to decide whether he will attend the bridal shower. Modern etiquette suggests that he show up toward the end of the shower to say hello and help stock up the car full of gifts. Some men even drop in for a few fun games.
According to a study by theknot.com, 43% of 2022 weddings took place between September and November. October was the most popular month to get married in 2022, accounting for 20% of all weddings. Fall weddings have become even more popular over the last few years—a trend that will likely continue.
Because the main point of a shower is to give gifts to the bride and it could seem as if her family were asking for gifts. Today, while it's still a faux pas for an engaged couple to throw their own shower, pretty much anyone else can host one.
Every woman who has received a baby or bridal shower invitation has, at one time or another, had to decline the invitation. This can be a touchy situation, especially if the honoree is a close friend or relative. It is best to be honest and polite.
Hosts of the different showers should be sure to consult each other on dates and guest lists so there isn't any overlap. It is common for Bridesmaids, mom and mother-in-laws to be invited to all showers.
The number one rule when it comes to wedding shower guest list etiquette: You should only invite people who are also invited to the wedding. Of course, that doesn't mean you have to invite everyone on the couple's wedding guest list—showers are typically much more intimate.
The appropriate amount of money to give as a bridal shower gift is the same as the amount you would spend on a tangible present: $50–$75. Give the couple as much as you can comfortably afford within that range. If your budget doesn't quite stretch to the $50 mark, that's okay.
Is It Appropriate To Have More Than One Shower? Absolutely, but the bride needs to be realistic. There really isn't a need for more than two showers. There will always be exceptions to the "rules," (i.e. friends across the country who want to throw you a party, etc.), but usually, two to three showers are enough.
The Mother of the Groom Can Co-Host the Bridal Shower
If the mother of the groom is very close with the bride, then she may feel as though it's her duty to pitch in, too. If your mom, sister, or friends are on board with the idea of a co-host, then this is an entirely acceptable route.