Validation means that we are acknowledging another person's emotions, thoughts, experiences, values, and beliefs. Validation isn't about agreeing, placating, “fixing” the other person, trying to get someone to change, or repeating back what the other person has said.
For example, imagine that your loved one is behaving angrily toward you. If they have already communicated that they are feeling angry, simply demonstrate that you've heard them: "I understand you are angry." If they haven't communicated their feelings, you might say, "You seem really angry. Is that what's going on?"
Inattentive invalidator: The most common one, when someone ignores you completely. Judgmental invalidation: This is a case in which people judge you all the time. Controlling invalidation: Where your actions are controlled by someone else. Belligerent invalidators: Who refuse to listen to your side of the story.
In relationships, emotional validation is an important way for you to make your partner feel seen and affirm their sense of self. It shows them you care about their experiences and helps them feel secure and understood.
What happens when someone doesn't validate your feelings?
Problems managing emotions: Emotional invalidation can lead to confusion, self-doubt, and distrust in your own emotions. It communicates that your inner thoughts and feelings are “wrong.” With repeated exposure, you might begin to distrust the validity of your own personal experiences.
Invalidation often leads to emotional distancing, conflict, and disruption in relationships, as well as feelings of loneliness, worthlessness, confusion, and inferiority in the affected individual. Psychologist Marsha M. Linehan, Ph.
In any healthy relationship, it's important to validate someone's feelings when they're upset. Start by listening and responding in simple terms. From there, try to empathize as much as you can. Remember, you don't have to agree with someone's feelings or choices to acknowledge that their emotions are valid.
Emotional validation is the acceptance of a person's inner experience, thoughts, feelings, and emotions as valid and understandable. It involves genuinely listening to someone express their emotions (even if they're negative) without ignoring, rejecting, dismissing, belittling, or judging them.
A key difference between gaslighting and invalidating is that gaslighting intentionally seeks to manipulate or make the other person question themself. Invalidating dismisses or ignores the feelings or experiences of the other person, making them feel like they, or the experience, aren't important.
Many people fall somewhere in the middle, meaning you might be sensitive, but not too overreactive. But if you tend toward 'A' behaviour, then yes, you have an overreactive personality. Overreactive tendencies tend to come hand-in-hand with other behaviours and symptoms, including: being impulsive.
What you would like me to know and understand better is… Thank you for being open and sharing your feelings with me. I really appreciate it and now have a better understanding of… I'm sorry that I didn't fully understand how you were feeling about _____ until now, and I'm grateful that you've shared this with me.
How do you validate someone's feelings when they are sad?
To validate someone's feelings is first to be open and curious about someone's feelings. Next, it is to understand them, and finally it is to nurture them. Validation doesn't mean that you have to agree with or that the other person's experience has to make sense to you.
To validate someone's feelings and opinions, you can express empathy and understanding, use phrases such as "I see", "I hear", "I get it", or "That makes sense", ask for their input and feedback, and offer support and encouragement.
