Be Direct & Express How You Feel Explain to the person how you're being affected by what they're saying or let them know you're also feeling stressed. While this might be uncomfortable, it reminds the other person that you have feelings, too, which can sometimes keep them from making the conversation all about them.
Being open and honest is always the best solution to any problem. Explain to your loved one how their emotional tirades affect your own emotions. If the other person never lets you have any input, bring that to their attention. If they often scoff at the advice you offer, remind them of that.
Emotional dumping typically occurs as a heightened reactive response to a triggering event that is relived and repeated within a conversation. There is no open feedback, no desire for a solution, and most often, a one-sided conversation.
Gently, let them know that it was hard for you to support them and be a good friend and that it was causing you mental anguish and stress. Don't blame them for the end of the friendship or make them feel bad for going through a tough time, but instead take ownership of your decisions and your choices.
Most of the time, trauma dumping is not purposefully abusive or manipulative. It's more common for a dumper to be so involved in talking about their traumatic experience that they are unaware of how their story is impacting their listeners.
The bottom line
Venting is a healthy way to share negative emotions and reduce stress. But with trauma dumping, you overshare in a way that makes the listener feel overwhelmed or ignored.
Social media and trauma dumping
If you're using social media to share your experiences with the world to gain validation or sympathy, you might be trauma dumping. We often think of social media as a way to stay connected with friends and family — but for some people, it can be anything but positive.
Just tell the person honestly, that what he/she is saying is overwhelming you, and triggering strong unwanted emotions and memories. If the person stops the venting, good. If the person can't or won't stop, you say that you are unable to continue listening because you feel very overwhelmed and triggered.
Emotional Dumping, also known as Trauma Dumping or Toxic Venting, is the act of unconsciously expressing feelings without the awareness and consideration of the other person's emotional state. Emotional Dumping is not "just sharing our problems", it can be viewed as "venting" but the two do differ.
Let them vent their feelings and when they finish, pick any of their words that had a lot of emotion attached. These can be words such as “Never,” “Screwed up,” or any other words spoken with high inflection. Then reply with, “Say more about “never” (or “screwed up,” etc.) That will help them drain even more.
Set boundaries for what you will and won't allow in your relationship. An emotionally unavailable man may rely on confidence, control, or seduction to avoid emotional intimacy. Minimize these forms of manipulation by setting clear boundaries about what you will and won't accept as a part of your relationship.
Many narcissists react badly to boundaries or violate them entirely. One of the reasons narcissists overstep boundaries is because it allows them to hold themselves accountable for any wrongdoing they may have caused, something they intensely dislike!
Emotional dumping
An act of unconsciously sharing your feelings or perspectives without due regard for your partner's emotional state or needs. Emotional dumping is toxic, selfish and subconsciously cares very less about considering the emotional space of the other person.
To be clear, vulnerability is not self-serving
This means you must be thoughtful about what you share, when you share it, and why. That means: Don't overshare and dump your emotions on other people without purpose or thought. That's emotional dumping or projecting, not vulnerability.
Emotional offloading allows our children the opportunity to express their emotions in a safe space. Knowing that mom, dad, grandma, grandpa and care providers will be there to listen and understand, will validate their feelings and will allow them the time they need to heal.
What is Toxic Venting? Toxic venting feels like an attack on someone's character. Whether you are the one venting, or you're listening to someone else do it, this communication makes the other person out to be “the bad guy.” This type of bad-mouthing becomes an intense form of gossip.