Children who grow up with a narcissistic parent tend to suffer from at least some of the following as children and as adults: anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, self-doubt, self-blame, indecision, people-pleasing tendencies, difficulties with emotional intimacy, and codependent relationships.
A narcissistic mother may feel entitled or self-important, seek admiration from others, believe she is above others, lack empathy, exploit her children, put others down, experience hypersensitivity to criticism, believe she deserves special treatment, and worst of all, maybe naïve to the damage she is causing.
Red Flags When You're In a Relationship With a Narcissist
Downplays your emotions. Uses manipulative tactics to “win” arguments. Love bombing, especially after a fight. Makes you second-guess yourself constantly.
Narcissistic parents maintain their power by triangulating, or playing favorites. They may have a golden child who they compliment excessively, for example, while speaking badly about another child in the family. This can make children feel uncomfortable, disloyal and psychologically unsafe.
In narcissists' efforts to avoid blame, they often combine several fake apologies at once, such as, “I am sorry if I said anything to offend you, but I have strong opinions. Maybe you're too sensitive,” or, “I guess I should tell you I am sorry. But you know I would never deliberately hurt you.
Narcissistic parenting leaves you alone-and unable to trust. So later in life, you might experience emotional flashbacks and get triggered into intense feelings of anger, fear, shame and helpless depression.
However, some studies have also pointed out that narcissistic characteristics may not only arise from childhood environments characterized by neglect/abuse, but also from environments in which a child is sheltered or overly praised [11,14,15].
Effects of Being Raised by Narcissists
Dr. Brunell says, “The child typically suffers from low psychological well-being, such as low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety. They tend to try to please others and have poor ability to set boundaries or to say no to people's requests.
A narcissistic parent will often abuse the normal parental role of guiding their children and being the primary decision maker in the child's life, becoming overly possessive and controlling. This possessiveness and excessive control disempowers the child; the parent sees the child simply as an extension of themselves.
Victims of narcissistic abuse have been reported to experience symptoms similar to PTSD, known informally as narcissistic abuse syndrome. Symptoms include intrusive, invasive, or unwanted thoughts, flashbacks, avoidance, feelings of loneliness, isolation, and feeling extremely alert.
Daughters of narcissistic fathers may seek out narcissistic partners and accept partners who invalidate them, criticize them, and punish them through mind games. Until a woman recognizes that she is engaging in self-sabotage, she may be unable to find a “happily ever after” romantic relationship.
Signs of a father being a narcissist include if he is self-centered, vain, does not take criticism well, demands perfection, and goes into rages. Daughters of narcissistic fathers may feel they never get enough attention. Sons of narcissistic dads may feel they can never measure up.
Narcissistic friends seek out constant praise, prioritize their own needs, lack empathy, have high expectations of their friends, and often end friendships when they no longer serve them.
2 people raised by narcissistic moms describe feeling like an after-thought, and turning into people-pleasers as a result | Business Insider India.
Feeling valued for how you're perceived (not who you are)
A mother with narcissistic tendencies is typically overly concerned with her daughter's appearance and achievements and how they reflect back on her, says Lis. As a result, the daughter doesn't learn to be her authentic self.
It comes hand-in-hand with this that narcissists hate being criticised or called out. Which is exactly why there's one word in particular narcissistic people cannot stand: "no".
One of the keys to spotting narcissistic personality disorder is observing the “three Es” — exploitation, entitlement, and empathy impairment. However, this is different from lacking empathy altogether. Dr.
“I Can't Control How You Feel About Me”2. “I Hear What You're Saying”3. “I'm Sorry You Feel That Way”4. “Everything Is Okay”5.