Toilet anxiety, toilet phobia or paruresis may be triggered by an unpleasant experience, such as a noisy or smelly toilet. Children might remember this each time they go - leading to an association of anxiety with going to the toilet. They may also start to hold in wee or poo to avoid using the toilet.
Why does my kid refuse to poop? Stool withholding behavior is more common in boys, but any child may start withholding poop at any time during the potty training process, Dr. Goldman says. “The most common reason is that they passed a very hard or large stool that was painful for the child,” she says.
Do a practice run Go with your kid to the school bathroom to practise locking and unlocking the stall door or to see if the flushing noise is scary. “This desensitizes an anxious child so they feel more comfortable,” says Cummings. Touch base with the teacher to see if there's an issue with the rules.
Water helps those sphincter muscles to relax and release. When you're trying to get your child to sit longer on the potty AND relax and release their pee, it helps to have some water play activity. The sound and feeling of water can help trigger a pee release during potty training.
The Toilet
Your child might wonder what happens to the pee-pee and poo-poo, or if they can get sucked in. Children often have a fear of pooping on the potty because they do not feel secure sitting on the toilet. The seat is too big, the toilet is too high, and they can't plant their feet on the floor.
Allow your child to play on the potty so they can get used to it. Most children complete potty training by 36 months. The average length it takes kids to learn the process is about six months. Girls learn faster, usually completing toilet training two to three months before boys do.
Many children show signs of being ready for potty training between ages 18 and 24 months. However, others might not be ready until they're 3 years old. There's no rush. If you start too early, it might take longer to train your child.
Peeing in the potty is usually the first potty training win. As they master this skill, continue to use diapers between bathroom trips. Pooping in the potty takes longer because bowel movements are scary for some kids. Kids can have a bowel movement once a day or every other day.
Ways to overcome potty training resistance. Make it your child's choice. Let him know he can switch to big boy underwear or Pull-Ups and use the potty whenever he wants to, and that you're there to help when he asks. Then give it a rest and don't talk about it for a while.
Demonstrate to your child that there is nothing to fear by letting them see you sitting on the toilet. Decorate the cistern with some child friendly stickers. Replace the toilet seat with a funky themed one chosen by your child.
For some the phase lasts a month or so. For others it can be a year. This is called “Toilet Refusal for Stool Only.” One scenario is a child that asks for a diaper at nap time or bed time, go in their room and poop in the diaper, and then asked to be changed.
If your child doesn't have a bowel movement for three or four days in a row, you should call your doctor. He or she will suggest something to give your child to prevent constipation. After you've done this, you should go right back to the step you were on before and keep trying.
Toilet anxiety, also known as toilet phobia, relates to two conditions: paruresis, the fear to urinate, and parcopresis, the fear of having a bowel movement in public (e.g., worry about smells, noises). Research into these conditions is limited, despite the anecdotal evidence that they are quite common.
And remember that if there are a lot of stressors in your child's life (like a recent move or a new sibling), it can make potty training tougher. But as long as you give potty training a fair shot, “for most kids, they'll take to it somewhere between ages 3 and 4,” says Dr. Klemsz.
The American Association of Pediatrics reports that kids who begin potty training at 18 months are generally not fully trained until age 4, while kids who begin training at age 2 are generally fully trained by age 3. Many kids will not master bowel movements on the toilet until well into their fourth year.
The three-day potty training method is a toilet training process that calls for your child to go diaper- and pants-free for three days in the house as he gets used to going to the potty regularly. The idea is that, by keeping your toddler naked from the waist down, he'll learn to be more in tune with his bodily cues.
The symptoms of ADHD can interfere with toilet training and the establishment of ongoing continence. In fact, considering a diagnosis of ADHD in a 5–year–old with toilet refusal or an older child with encopresis or daytime urinary incontinence may aid in understanding the problem and in developing a treatment plan.
Toddlers who cry right before they release or directly after are most likely afraid of losing a part of themselves. That's right, to your toddler their poop or pee is a part of themselves. Imagine if you went to go to the bathroom and your limb fell off into the toilet, and then you were expected to flush it!?
Don't Force the Issue
If your child refuses to go, forcing them to go and sit on the potty will likely create a negatively charged atmosphere and can ultimately lead to more resistance.
“Most kids should be able to hold their pee for two to three hours,” Anneliese Schlachter, a certified potty training consultant, tells Romper. “That can fluctuate in the beginning learning stage, or depending on their fluid intake.
Potty training is a development milestone
Just as your child's first steps mark progress in her young life, potty training is another significant milestone. “Toilet training is a step in the process of overall development,” says Dr. Kushnir, who is an expert on bed wetting, bladder control, and child development.