The toxic traits of a toxic person include unsupportive and unpleasant behavior, being manipulative, judgmental, controlling, and self-centered. Such people can be the cause of various negative feelings and emotions that you may be experiencing like depression, anxiousness, worthlessness, and unhappiness.
Toxic people are often pessimistic, and their attitude can be contagious. If you spend too much time around them, you may start to doubt yourself and question your ability to achieve your goals. Additionally, toxic people can be manipulative and Machiavellian.
Toxic relationships generally follow three stages: idealizing, devaluing, and discarding. Learn about each of these stages and the impact it has on you.
People with toxic traits know they have them
But many people with toxic traits don't realize that their behavior impacts others. You may have toxic traits that you don't know about. Some toxic traits, like absolutism, manifest subtly.
If you've addressed toxic behavior with the person exhibiting it and they have taken it to heart, it's possible for toxic people to change. “Toxic people can absolutely change,” Kennedy says, “however they must see their part in the problem before they are likely to find the motivation to do so.”
The four behaviours are Blaming, Contempt, Defensiveness and Stonewalling. Relationship expert Dr John Gottman termed these "The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse" as they spell disaster for any personal or professional relationship.
In some cases, toxic behavior may stem from underlying psychological issues such as anxiety, depression, or borderline personality disorder. People with these conditions may engage in toxic behavior as a way to cope with their own emotional struggles.
Toxic people prey on your insecurities – they'll make you feel good about yourself while also pulling you down, so they can feel good about themselves. This helps them control you – the constant praising you and then criticizing you helps them brainwash you, so you never know which way is up.
The term 'toxic emotions' is regularly used, but what are they exactly? They are feelings of anger, guilt, shame, anxiety, fear, self-loathing, regret, bitterness, and resentment – feelings that bring no positive benefit to our lives or our mental wellbeing.
One of the classic signs for someone who is in the early stages of toxic negativity is that they will have what feels like a personality transplant, often multiple times a day. They will yo-yo between happy and helpful and then become destructive, as soon as one of their trigger buttons has been pressed.
Toxic people love saying hurtful things to you to try to make you feel upset. When they say something mean don't rush to answer immediately. Calm down and make sure you are able to say exactly what you want without any emotion. Remember that your pain is the toxic person's drug!
Toxic text messages are texts that drain you physically and mentally while affecting the overall health of your relationship. These texts demand you to act or behave in a certain way that is unnatural and only satisfies your partner's insecurities.
If a relationship stops bringing joy, and instead consistently makes you feel sad, angry, anxious or “resigned, like you've sold out,” it may be toxic, Glass says. You may also find yourself envious of happy couples. Fuller says negative shifts in your mental health, personality or self-esteem are all red flags, too.
This doesn't mean you have to interact with them, but people aren't born “toxic” and generally get that way from observing such behavior in the home as a child or experiencing abuse. Setting healthy relationship boundaries with toxic people is essential, although it can be very challenging.
They make you doubt yourself
Toxic people have a way of making you feel guilty just for being you. One of the most common ways in which they do this is to poke holes in the way you are talking about something. Remember how they have an underlying tone when they ask you something?
There are generally three types of toxic entities; chemical, biological, and physical. Chemicals include inorganic substances such as lead, hydrofluoric acid, and chlorine gas, organic compounds such as methyl alcohol, most medications, and poisons from living things.