Most people find that grief lessens with time. A person who loses a loved one may always carry sadness and miss the person who has died, but they are able to find meaning and experience pleasure again. Some people even find new wisdom and strength after experiences of loss.
But be assured that these feelings are healthy and appropriate and will help you come to terms with your loss. Remember: It takes time to fully absorb the impact of a major loss. You never stop missing your loved one, but the pain eases after time and allows you to go on with your life.
Normally, feelings of physical pain will ease with time. But try to get as much rest as possible and listen to what your body needs. If you find you're still in pain after several weeks, speak with your GP.
The pain is caused by the overwhelming amount of stress hormones being released during the grieving process. These effectively stun the muscles they contact. Stress hormones act on the body in a similar way to broken heart syndrome. Aches and pains from grief should be temporary.
The death of a husband or wife is well recognized as an emotionally devastating event, being ranked on life event scales as the most stressful of all possible losses.
Grief is overwhelming. It is painful beyond measure. Grief is the realization that you will never, ever, see, hear, touch, or smell a loved one again. It is the most painful emotion that any human can ever experience.
Often the second year is the hardest as that's when the real grief work might begin. This is the time when you may be ready to face your grief head on and deal with any issues that are holding you back.
Depression is usually the longest and most difficult stage of grief. Depression can be a long and difficult stage in the grieving process, but it's also when people feel their deepest sadness.
People react to grief in very different ways. Some people find they cry very frequently and may be overwhelmed by the strength of their emotions. Others may feel numb for some time, or feel unable to cry. Some people experience swings between extremes.
Do not try to self-medicate your emotional pain away. Trying to dull the pain you're feeling with alcohol or drug use is a losing proposition. The “grieving process” is described as a process for a reason; it requires certain courses of action to achieve a result.
That's because, researchers say, our brains do their best to keep us from dwelling on our inevitable demise. A study found that the brain shields us from existential fear by categorising death as an unfortunate event that only befalls other people.
It's common for the grief process to take a year or longer. A grieving person must resolve the emotional and life changes that come with the death of a loved one. The pain may become less intense, but it's normal to feel emotionally involved with the deceased for many years.
Pain is much less common than fatigue. In total, 7.4% of patients reported severe pain at the beginning of their palliative care and only 2.5% reported severe pain in the last few days. Breathing difficulties cause more distress than pain in the final days of life.
Emotional numbness is a common experience following a trauma, so it's no wonder it can happen after a death. The people I support have all lost a loved one to a terminal illness, which can add an extra layer to their trauma.
Still, my attention was grabbed when I read a research paper and saw this sentence: “The largest emotional losses are from the death of a spouse; the second-worst in severity are the losses from the death of a child; the third-worst is the death of a parent.” Until that moment, I had assumed that losing a child is ...
Intense feelings can be frightening, but they usually ease over time. You might experience: shock and feelings of unreality and disconnection, particularly in the days after the death. intense sadness, which can feel overwhelming.
Practice the three C's
As you build a plan, consider the “three Cs”: choose, connect, communicate. Choose: Choose what's best for you. Even during dark bouts of grief, you still possess the dignity of choice. “Grief often brings the sense of loss of control,” said Julie.
They often become well acquainted with the concept of grief. Older adults who are more exposed to the experiences of loss does not mean these losses become easier to accept. Studies have shown that the grief process does not change with age. Grief is grief, no matter your age.
Cortisol is a catabolic hormone that breaks down tissue and, in excess, can lead to collagen breakdown and accelerated aging. Grief or bereavement releases the hormone cortisol in reaction to stress that breaks down tissue and, in excess, can lead to collagen breakdown and accelerated aging.
The intensity of grief may change over time and the characteristics of grief you experience change as well. Yet grief rooted in the death of a loved one never goes away and that is a good thing. Grieving is not about making it end as quickly as possible.
The heartbreak of grief can increase blood pressure and the risk of blood clots. Intense grief can alter the heart muscle so much that it causes "broken heart syndrome," a form of heart disease with the same symptoms as a heart attack. Stress links the emotional and physical aspects of grief.
PUBLICATION: About Grief
After the death of a loved one, you may experience many changes in your mental and emotional state of mind. You may find yourself simply being in a daze, unable to focus, or going aimlessly in circles at times.
Extreme stress, the kind experienced after the loss of a loved one, is associated with changes in heart muscle cells or coronary blood vessels (or both) that prevent the left ventricle from contracting effectively — a condition called stress-induced cardiomyopathy or broken-heart syndrome.