Researchers have found that the social challenges of children with ADHD include disturbed relationships with their peers, difficulty making and keeping friends, and deficiencies in appropriate social behavior.
People with ADHD may have a hard time developing healthy social skills from childhood through adulthood, especially if their condition goes untreated. That said, it's possible to improve your social skills at any point in life.
They may find it challenging to make and keep friends because of their brain's executive functioning impairment. The brain's executive control manages their ability to wait their turn, avoid getting distracted, direct their actions, control their emotions, and use their working memory to respond in social settings.
The problem: The social maturity of children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD or ADD) may be a few years behind that of their peers. In addition, they have difficulty reading verbal and physical social cues, misinterpreting remarks, or not getting jokes or games.
If you have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), you might find making and keeping friends, talking to co-workers, or just saying the right things in a social setting difficult or awkward.
Individuals with ADHD who require solitude do not necessarily feel lonely or disconnected from others. Instead, they require alone time to manage their symptoms effectively and engage in activities that promote their mental health.
It is easy for people with ADHD to lose confidence and feel frustrated with themselves or others. They may get discouraged and can even feel incompetent and unhappy with their lives because of these difficulties. Some withdraw from social activities and become isolated as a result.
Many of the traits associated with ADHD — disorganization, procrastination, forgetfulness — are often considered by others to be traits of "immature adults". It's hard not to feel like you're failing at adulthood when everyone else seems to manage just fine.
Common ADHD-Related Problems
Impulsive spending or overspending. Starting fights or arguing. Trouble maintaining friendships and romantic relationships. Speeding and dangerous driving.
“[People with ADHD] often struggle socially because they may miss subtle social cues; lose focus mid-conversation and realize they've not heard most of what the other person has said to them; or they may impulsively make statements which come across as inappropriate or rude without meaning to,” writes Natalia van ...
During conversations or presentations, a person with ADHD might blurt out things inappropriately. While this seems rude, experts say it's actually part of their symptoms.
Be on the lookout for nonverbal clues.
These include body language, such as moving away from you, cutting conversations short, or crossing their arms or legs. Also note facial expressions, such as red faces, scowls, tight lips, or hurt or angry eyes.
Examples of common ADHD texting challenges:
Forgetting to check or reply to messages. Perfectionism; overthinking your texts, sometimes erasing them completely. Misinterpreting tone of voice (sarcasm, joking, etc.) General social anxiety.
Controlling behavior and distrust. Abusive — this is also inclusive of emotionally abusive behaviors, such as gaslighting, love bombing, breadcrumbing etc. Disrespectful. Financial abuse or dishonesty.
Atypical Presentation of ADHD Symptoms
Sleep disturbances (has trouble with sleep initiation, sleep deprived, can't wake up easily, etc.) Weak executive function (poor recall of information, internalizing language, controlling emotions, problem-solving, etc.)
With ADHD, a child or teen may have rapid or impulsive speech, physical restlessness, trouble focusing, irritability, and, sometimes, defiant or oppositional behavior.
Similar to the hyperactive symptoms, impulsive symptoms are typically seen by the time a child is four years old and increase during the next three to four years to peak in severity when the child is seven to eight years of age.
The brain's frontal lobes, which are involved in ADHD, continue to mature until we reach age 35. In practical terms, this means that people with ADHD can expect some lessening of their symptoms over time. Many will not match the emotional maturity of a 21-year-old until their late 30's.
Because someone with ADHD may be lacking in stimulation in their prefrontal cortex, they may seek it in ways large and small. This can also play out in the person with ADHD making blunt comments that could unintentionally hurt their partner's feelings. The need for stimulation is high for those with ADHD.
This is due to impulsivity that people with ADHD struggle with. If you can't seem to wait your turn to speak, it may be an issue worth looking into. If you've officially become the “flaky” friend, it could also be a sign. Individuals with high-functioning ADHD may appear flaky or scattered periodically or always.
But social skills don't come naturally to all children. Making friends can be particularly difficult for girls with ADHD. Hyperactive and impulsive girls sometimes have trouble taking turns or not getting their way. They might be too loud and aggressive, or just seem immature to other girls their age.
People with ADHD live in a permanent present and have a hard time learning from the past or looking into the future to see the inescapable consequences of their actions. “Acting without thinking” is the definition of impulsivity, and one of the reasons that individuals with ADHD have trouble learning from experience.
If you have ADHD, you might find it hard to date, make friends, or parent. That's partly because good relationships require you to be aware of other people's thoughts and feelings. But ADHD can make it hard for you to pay attention or react the right way.
“It could look like fidgeting, being impatient, having racing or nonstop thoughts, always moving (always cleaning, needing to do something and unable to sit still), or social anxiety.” Other characteristics of the ADHD introvert, according to Juliano-Villani, may include: procrastination. time blindness.