Narcissists love to prove their importance and superiority to anyone who crosses their path. That's why they will find a way to destroy you if they feel you are getting in their way or criticizing their flaws.
A narcissistic person often continually invalidates other's feelings. Eventually the person doubts most of what he or she feels and thinks. A narcissist distorts a person's empathy and introspectiveness, making him or her think they are character flaws instead of gifts.
They don't want you to know who you are, what you think, and feel. A narcissist must destroy or come in between you and your perception of self. They have to wiggle themselves in between you. In that space, they don't want you looking within anymore; they want you to focus solely on them.
Malignant narcissists cause severe destruction to our lives and our psyches – what's more, as you can tell from these horrifying stories, they sadistically take pleasure in causing that destruction. They set you up to look like the perpetrator while they play the victims.
This manipulation is often done through hoovering and intermittent reinforcement, but narcissists will also deliberately hurt the victim to get them to re-engage with the relationship. This is called baiting, when a narcissist uses you vulnerabilities and insecurities against you to provoke you into a confrontation.
While narcissists are not always dangerous, some can become violent when triggered and angered. Depending on the severity of their disorder, they may use manipulation or even physical abuse to maintain control over a situation.
Next steps. Experiencing a relationship with someone who lives with NPD can be challenging. While people with narcissism aren't devoid of emotions, their motivations may be self-focused. They can know they're hurting your feelings, but as long as it elevates their status, they may not care.
It comes hand-in-hand with this that narcissists hate being criticised or called out. Which is exactly why there's one word in particular narcissistic people cannot stand: "no".
If you're in a relationship with a narcissist, you may find that you're sacrificing things for the sake of their needs on a regular basis, but they refuse to do the same for you. It also means they'll do almost anything to others in order to meet their own needs.
It is a misconception that narcissists target weak, vulnerable people because they will be easier to manipulate. They actually go for the exact opposite. They look for people who are confident, successful, attractive and strong-willed.
A person with narcissistic personality or narcissistic traits frequently uses manipulation tactics to influence and control others. Common examples of this include gaslighting, triangulation, love bombing, and many others.
In general, it may involve intense emotional reactions and a tendency toward vindictive behaviors, but it could also lead to depression and withdrawal. Narcissistic collapse isn't a permanent occurrence once it happens. Typically, the emotional pain will decrease and the person may return to feeling their usual.
For this reason, when the narcissist hurts you, they are unable and/or unwilling to understand how their actions negatively affect you. With this lack of empathy, the narcissist can actively engage in repeated abusive behaviors because they don't have to feel how they are making you feel.
To remain powerful and in control, a narcissist needs to have a constant source of admiration and validation to fuel their narcissistic supply and ego. When the attention of others is directed elsewhere, they may use anger, verbal aggression, or shouting to shift the situation back to them.
Pretty much anything that doesn't give a narcissist what they feel entitled to will make them angry. If you ignore them, disregard their advice, or make decisions without getting their input, they will make their disapproval known to you.
Narcissists' Greatest Fear
Although narcissists act superior, entitled and boastful, underneath their larger-than-life facade lies their greatest fear: That they are ordinary. For narcissists, attention is like oxygen. Narcissists believe only special people get attention.
A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.
Type As can also be dangerous to narcissists
Although they can be targeted, type A people can also become a narcissist's worst nightmare. One of the most important defenses against dark personalities is having strong boundaries yourself, and type A people are usually aware they have the right to build them.
While the narcissist may not know that are being mean because this would require them to be able to understand how someone else feels, they do know that their actions will likely lead to you changing your behavior, which is usually by backing down in one way or the other.
They will often deploy a variety of narcissistic relationship patterns such as manipulation, charismatic, and exploitational tactics in order to ensure that their own needs and wants are met. As a spouse, you may be the subject of their manipulation and abuse, while your partner treats everyone else positively.
It is common for people with a narcissistic personality disorder to regret discarding or losing someone, but it does not mean what you might think. If they feel regret, it is not because they hurt you. It is for losing something that they value. You are a possession, not a real person.