Narcissists have extreme difficulty really appreciating others. “They cannot simply enjoy you for who you are, feel proud of you, or acknowledge your efforts in any capacity—for example, when you're trying to help or make them happy,” says Dr.
First and foremost, the narcissist will use your kindness against you. They look at your areas of vulnerability so they can use it against you when they need to feel better about themselves. Your kindness is seen as a weakness by the narcissist and is a place of entry for their abusive narcissistic ways.
Remember, narcissists view kindness as a weakness, and they will use kind people for their own means and their own twisted desires.
So are highly empathetic people
Empaths and narcissists are often drawn to each other, because empaths have a lot of compassion and understanding to give, while narcissists thrive on someone worshipping them.
A narcissist won't appreciate all you go through to accommodate or satisfy them. When you're dealing with an extremely selfish person, it's often easier to let them get their way than to try to make them conform to average social norms.
Attention-seeking behavior—positive or negative—is essentially narcissistic supply. Wanting attention, accolades, and validation are not inherently narcissistic. We all need to feel heard and accepted, but narcissists crave this attention constantly.
Bottom Line. Narcissists can sometimes be helpful and caring. However, more often than not, they only pretend to have these qualities.
Someone with narcissistic tendencies will be able to identify others who will allow them to be dominant in the relationship. This means that if they see you as someone who will be overly accommodating to their needs, will allow them to be in control, they will be more attracted to you.
Put Your Needs First. Narcissists make others feel guilty about being happy because they expect everyone to put the narcissist's happiness first. If you're not constantly praising them or accepting their criticisms that make them feel superior, they won't be satisfied.
Narcissists are attracted to people with Cluster B personality disorder traits because they are easy to control and manipulate. Narcissists often use gaslighting, manipulation, and intimidation to control their victims. They may also use their victim's vulnerabilities against them.
Narcissists did not think they were more conscientious, fair, likable, or reliable than others thought them to be. This pattern reflects that narcissists inflate their view of themselves in order to enhance their self-esteem. That means narcissists are focused on having an outsize impact on the world around them.
A narcissist takes advantage of others
A narcissist's sense of entitlement combined with their lack of empathy makes them ripe for taking advantage of people for their own benefit.
Narcissists are Nice to Others to Maintain a Public Persona That Creates a Support Group to Validate Their Reality. When a narcissist is nice to others it allows them to maintain a charming, charismatic, and captivating public persona that creates a support group for their reality.
Highly empathetic
Individuals who have a high level of empathy are extremely appealing to narcissists because narcissists crave acknowledgment and validation for their thoughts and feelings (clinically, being "mirrored").
It is because of this that they may find it difficult to understand other people's feelings or perspectives, a self-centredness that can cause them to act selfishly and exploit others for their own gain. “As narcissists do not have empathy, they are not able to genuinely care or love you,” explains Davey.
2. They are only generous with money in public. To narcissists, spending large amounts of money on others can be a way to get people to like them. They may be stingy in private, for example, but cover dinner for colleagues or give gifts just for show.
Although narcissists act superior, entitled and boastful, underneath their larger-than-life facade lies their greatest fear: That they are ordinary. For narcissists, attention is like oxygen. Narcissists believe only special people get attention.
Cerebral Narcissists. As discussed earlier, the word somatic relates to the body. Therefore, somatic narcissists are obsessed with their physical appearance and weight, often securing self-worth from their body image. On the other hand, cerebral narcissists gain their sense of value from their intellect.
They will often deploy a variety of narcissistic relationship patterns such as manipulation, charismatic, and exploitational tactics in order to ensure that their own needs and wants are met. As a spouse, you may be the subject of their manipulation and abuse, while your partner treats everyone else positively.
Thus, narcissists may pay special attention to their appearance, leading to observable manifestations such as matching, fashionable clothes, and a tidy, organized appearance.
Generally, narcissists are very frugal with their money and defensive with it. When it comes to their possessions, they don't give them freely. There is, however, more to this greed than self-preservation. Due to their lack of empathy, narcissists may not understand the benefits of sharing their resources.
Regardless of their financial status, the narcissist gives whether they have money or not. However, they give from a depraved sense of self. In extreme cases, this type of individual may be addicted to giving, even willing to go into debt. The giving, you see, is more about looking good than it is generosity.
A Narcissist's Gift to You is Really a Gift to Herself
Specifically, narcissists give gifts with an eye to maintaining a relationship with the giver and to maintaining control in that relationship.