Yes, you absolutely can forgive someone and still choose not to be around them; forgiveness is about releasing your own anger and resentment for your healing, not about excusing their behavior or demanding reconciliation, and it's healthy to set boundaries or create distance, even ending the relationship, to protect your peace from toxic situations or repeated harm. Forgiveness frees you, allowing you to let go of the burden, while creating distance protects you from future pain, recognizing that a person's actions don't always warrant continued presence in your life, as shown in various online discussions, Reddit threads, and Quora posts.
Can you forgive somebody and then tell them that you don't want to see them again? The answer is yes. While we absolutely believe in forgiving others, we also believe that forgiving someone does not always mean that fellowship can be—or should be—restored.
You can fully forgive someone and not want anything to do with them or even so much as associate with them.
It is perfectly ok to forgive someone AND still walk away.
One of the persistent myths about forgiveness is that if you forgive someone, you have to continue being friends or colleagues. Sometimes continuing a relationship after forgiveness is possible.
You can forgive someone without trusting them or continuing a close relationship with them. Think about it this way: forgiveness is about your healing, not about the other person's worthiness. It's a gift you give yourself, releasing the burden of anger and resentment.
Additionally, we can live out the Golden Rule by forgiving others as we would like to be forgiven. This means letting go of grudges and resentment, extending a hand of reconciliation, and seeking restoration in relationships.
The 2-2-2 rule in love is a relationship guideline to keep connections strong by scheduling regular, dedicated time together: a date night every two weeks, a weekend getaway every two months, and a week-long vacation every two years, helping couples prioritize each other and break daily routines to maintain intimacy and fun.
Forgiveness has four stages: hate, hurt, heal, come together. (This model was inspired by Louis Smedes' book, “Forgive and Forget.” I've reordered Smedes' words, and I've changed my understanding of what each phase of the process means.)
There are situations when it's OK not to forgive someone. Here are just a few examples: You're still feeling the effects of their actions or experiencing PTSD because of how you were treated (particularly for childhood abuse).
You can forgive someone deeply and still never speak to them again. Forgiveness isn't always a doorway back into a relationship—it's often a release, a silent decision to no longer carry the weight of anger, betrayal, or pain. It doesn't mean the hurt didn't matter or that the damage wasn't real.
The Bible teaches that unselfish love is the basis for true forgiveness, since “it keeps no record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:5). Forgiving others means letting go of resentment and giving up any claim to be compensated for the hurt or loss we have suffered.
The biggest unforgivable sin varies by faith, but in Christianity, it's often seen as blasphemy against the Holy Spirit, a persistent rejection of God's grace, while in Islam, the gravest unforgivable sin is shirk, or associating partners with God, if not repented. Pride is also considered a foundational, serious sin across many faiths, linked to the downfall of figures like Satan.
Forgiveness means different things to different people. But in general, it involves an intentional decision to let go of resentment and anger. The act that hurt or offended you might always be with you. But working on forgiveness can lessen that act's grip on you.
God often speaks through discomfort not to punish us, but to protect us. If the presence of someone is disturbing your peace, shifting your focus from Him, or dimming your light, it might be His gentle way of saying 'Let go, I have better for you. ' Trust His direction, even when it hurts.
You can forgive someone and still choose to walk away because forgiveness isn't about excusing or forgetting what happened - it's about understanding. Understanding that people act from their own pain, their own limitations, and their own level of self-awareness and capacity.
The three types of forgiveness are: exoneration, forbearance and release.
Toxic forgiveness occurs when an individual pardons another person prematurely or under duress, often without genuine resolution of the underlying issues. This form of forgiveness can stem from societal pressures, internalized guilt, or a desire to maintain peace at the cost of one's well-being.
But it does provide some rough guidelines as to how soon may be too soon to make long-term commitments and how long may be too long to stick with a relationship. Each of the three numbers—three, six, and nine—stands for the month that a different common stage of a relationship tends to end.
Forgiveness does not mean an automatic return to the relationship. Forgiving someone who has hurt you does not mean immediate reconciliation takes place. While the goal in broken relationships is always reconciliation, it is not always possible right away.
Forgiveness is not the same thing as mending a broken relationship. That's called reconciliation, and reconciliation requires TWO people, not just you.In fact, the ability to forgive often goes hand-in-hand with accountability. For instance: You can forgive someone AND maintain healthy distance.
For some, denial or anger is the hardest while others may struggle with bargaining. Depression, however, often lasts the longest and someone is most at risk of experiencing prolonged, destructive grief during this phase.
Forgiveness doesn't require the end of anger. Forgiveness requires letting go of hatred and the desire to annihilate the other person. Anger can remain because anger tells the truth about the harm.
survived the dreaded two-year mark (i.e. the most common time period when couples break up), then you're destined to be together forever… right? Unfortunately, the two-year mark isn't the only relationship test to pass, nor do you get to relax before the seven-year itch.
While many factors contribute, many experts point to poor communication (especially criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling) and a breakdown in emotional connection/trust, often stemming from dishonesty or disrespect, as the #1 things that destroy marriages, eroding intimacy and making partners feel unheard and unloved over time. Infidelity, financial stress, and shifting priorities (like putting family/in-laws above spouse) are also major contributors that feed these core issues.
The 70/30 rule in relationships suggests balancing time together (70%) with personal time apart (30%) for hobbies, friends, and self-growth, promoting independence and preventing codependency, while another view says it's about accepting 70% of your partner as "the one" and learning to live with the other 30% of quirks, requiring effort to manage major issues within that space, not a pass for abuse. Both interpretations emphasize finding a sustainable balance and acknowledging that relationships aren't always 50/50, with the key being communication and effort, not strict adherence to numbers.