Both men and women can be pallbearers, and many people often choose either family members or close friends of the deceased to carry the coffin. Traditionally, there are four to six pallbearers at a funeral, depending on the weight of the coffin.
Getting chosen to be a Pallbearer is an honour more so if you are a woman. It is not common to see women carrying the casket, but that is not to say that there is anything wrong with women taking up this honourable duty in a funeral service.
Men or women may be pallbearers. When selecting them, make sure they can keep their emotions in check.
Pallbearer Attire
Women should wear dark conservative clothes, which can be a modest dress, or pants or skirt suit set. Women should not wear high heels but opt for dark shoes with a flat or low heel as you will need to carry the coffin for some distance.
Traditionally, men are seen as pallbearers. But, to answer the question in the title, yes, women do the job as well. This actually depends on the discretion of the family members, or in some instances, based on who will volunteer for the duty.
Common choices for selecting pallbearers are siblings, adult children, grown grandchildren, nieces and nephews, close friends, and colleagues. Anyone you choose can serve as a pallbearer at your funeral.
Siblings, adult children, grown grandchildren, nieces and nephews, close friends, and colleagues are all common choices for pallbearers. However, anyone can serve as a pallbearer.
In most instances, men are pallbearers, so it seems like the norm. However, there is no cultural or religious customs stating that women can't serve as pallbearers. The only reason why they don't do this job is that they may not be strong enough to lift the casket, which can sometimes be quite heavy.
Is Carrying a Coffin Heavy for Pallbearers? Yes, carrying a coffin can be burdensome for pallbearers. The body, casket, and hardware may weigh 400 pounds. If that weight is divided evenly among six pallbearers, each one is responsible for about 66 pounds.
There are actually no rules about who can carry a coffin at a funeral. Anyone can be a pallbearer as long as they feel able to do it. Plus, you can always ask the funeral director what will work best.
It is a common practice to cover the legs as there is swelling in the feet and shoes don't fit. As part of funeral care, the body is dressed and preserved, with the prime focus on the face. Post embalming, bodies are often placed without shoes; hence covering the legs is the way to offer a dignified funeral.
If you have been asked to be a pallbearer but do not feel comfortable performing this role, it is perfectly acceptable to decline. There is no shame in admitting that carrying a casket is not something you feel comfortable doing. If you decline, simply thank the family for asking and express your condolences.
Pallbearers will have to carry the casket with the body inside, so they will have to transport the body's weight and the coffin. 370 to 400 pounds is the final weight that pallbearers will carry if the casket is standard sized, 200 pounds heavy, whereas the adult body is 200 pounds (male) or 170 pounds (female).
Video shows how one pallbearer helping to lower the coffin slipped and fell on top of it, causing the lid to split in half and an elderly woman's body to roll out. The tragic accident happened during a funeral in...
Due to this heaviness, pallbearers are typically males over the age of 16. However, women can also serve as pallbearers. Those chosen are often close to the departed or the bereaved family.
The officiant will usually lead the procession and pallbearers carrying the coffin tend to follow. Immediate family and close friends will often walk behind the coffin, followed by other guests.
Unless the family expresses a desire otherwise, it is customary in most cases for pallbearers to wear a suit, sports coat, and optional tie. It is not necessary, of course, but the dress represents the dignity & respect of the role. Plan to arrive about 30 minutes prior to the funeral service.
Usually the head end of the coffin is the heaviest, thus the strongest two of your six pallbearers should take the handles at this end.
They may wear white gloves in order to prevent damaging the casket and to show respect to the deceased person.
Guardsman Fletcher Cox, from the 1st Battalion Grenadier Guards, was one of eight chosen to carry the coffin of the longest-reigning monarch in British history - and also the youngest.
As early as the 1700s, gloves were given to pallbearers by the deceased's family to handle the casket. They were a symbol of purity, and considered a symbol of respect and honor.
If You Haven't Selected Pallbearers
In these instances, you can work with your local funeral home to assign extra employees to help perform this service. You might also work with a local church to find senior church leaders or even youth who would be able to help.
Pallbearer etiquette
Carry the coffin with dignity and respect. Carefully follow the funeral director's instructions. Wear smart and appropriate attire. Walk slowly and steadily. Arrive at the funeral slightly early.
Pallbearers need to dress appropriately. Unless the bereaved specify otherwise, men should wear dark, solid suits with white shirts and conservative ties, and women should wear dark pantsuits or dresses. You really don't want to trip when carrying the casket.
The role of pallbearer or honorary pallbearer is both an honor and a great responsibility. The duties primarily consist of helping to carry or accompany the casket throughout a traditional funeral or burial.