Narcissistic supply is a form of psychological addiction where the narcissist requires, and even demands, limitless special treatment, admiration, importance, or validation to feed their sense of entitlement and self-centeredness.
Narcissists compare supply insofar as they assess what kind of supply they need right now and whether they can obtain it from that source. In general though, narcissists prefer new supply to old supply. As with all things new, it feels more special.
The answer is simple, although narcissists prefers the highly charged dynamic of their Primary Narcissistic Supply, however inevitability things go wrong (i.e. they may suddenly become bored, or they may fall-out with the person because they are not getting what they want from them).
Narcissists thrive on getting attention, feeling special, and having control. He is an expert at getting an emotional reaction out of you – good or bad – because it makes him feel powerful and better than you.
Narcissists are attracted to people they can manipulate.
Let them tell you what to wear, what to eat, or how to speak—then, completely brush them off and tell them that you don't care about their opinion. Keep in mind that control can also be a form of abuse.
Narcissists seek out an endless supply of validation, attention, and praise to compensate for low self esteem, confidence, and a perceived lack of acceptance that's often a result of early childhood trauma and attachment issues.
To be admired and to get their supply, narcissists employ various strategies, including impression management. They ingratiate themselves using their charm, emotional intelligence, bragging, seduction, and manipulation. Receiving attention and admiration boosts their weak self and lack of self-esteem.
Grandiose sense of self-importance
Grandiosity is the defining characteristic of narcissism. More than just arrogance or vanity, grandiosity is an unrealistic sense of superiority. Narcissists believe they are unique or “special” and can only be understood by other special people.
The primary narcissistic supply is based on attention in both its public forms such as recognition, fame, infamy, stardom, and its private, more interpersonal, types of praise, admiration, applause, fear, and repulsion.
When a narcissistic person doesn't get a constant supply of validation or someone injures their self-esteem, their confident and superior facade can collapse. A narcissistic collapse may happen because others don't see the person like they want to be seen, for example.
In order to fill their psychic void, narcissists spend the vast majority of their day- time energy mining for emotional reactions from the people in their lives. Emotional fuel can be positive, as in admiration, adulation, praise, empathy, compassion, attention, kindness, physical affection, and validation.
Narcissists are like cars and external validation is their fuel. Being a narcissist is a bit like being a car. Cars run on fuel. They have a gas tank to hold fuel. However, they cannot produce fuel for themselves or even refuel themselves without external help.
Truth 1: Narcissists fall in love with their fantasy of you.
They fall in love with their projections of whomever they currently idealize as the perfect mate. They can sound convincingly in love, but that is because they temporarily believe in the fantasy version of you created in their mind.
"Narcissists are drawn to those who can boost their own self-esteem and validate their sense of importance," Wasser told Insider. "Being associated with someone who is successful or admired can make the narcissist feel more important by proxy."
Narcissists are motivated by feeling superior and expanding their power, and so the only things that matter when helping others are receiving adulation, fame, influence, opportunities, notoriety, and other resources. They dont actually care about others because to them other people are just things to use.
Narcissists also deny emotional needs. They won't admit that they're being demanding and needy, because having needs makes them feel dependent and weak. They judge it as needy. Although narcissists don't usually put the needs of others first, some narcissists are actually people-pleasers and can be very generous.
“As narcissists do not have empathy, they are not able to genuinely care or love you,” explains Davey. Instead, narcissists will only have people in their lives that benefit them; they are very selfish people.
Red Flags When You're In a Relationship With a Narcissist
Downplays your emotions. Uses manipulative tactics to “win” arguments. Love bombing, especially after a fight. Makes you second-guess yourself constantly.
It comes hand-in-hand with this that narcissists hate being criticised or called out. Which is exactly why there's one word in particular narcissistic people cannot stand: "no".
Narcissists often use money as a tool for punishment. They may reward you financially when you do what they want, and then withhold money when they feel vindictive. This can feel unsafe, degrading and confusing.
They Take Responsibility for Everything. This is one of the main traits narcissists look for in their victims. If you are overly responsible and anxious about meeting other people's needs, this may make you a narcissist's perfect target. Narcissists never take accountability for their words and actions.
You need to realize that most narcissists will find a new supply before they ever even dump you-before your relationship ends. This means while he is cheating on you, he's already misleading and being dishonest to the new girl or boy aka supply.